by Roving Reporter, ©2023
(Mar. 23, 2023) — “Trump Won” (3:30)
“Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to ‘The Pulse of the Nation,’ the place to hear it here first. We’re starting a new segment that we hope you’ll enjoy; we call it ‘The $5 Bet’ where, after the interview, we ask you to send in your answer. Naturally, those of you reading the transcript of the show will be denied this opportunity but, hey, too bad; what can I say? I know, but that’s the way it is. And here is our guest, Mr. Dale Whitney from — where you from?”
“Nantucket is where I’m from, also from Port Byron.”
“Where the heck is Port Byron?”
“West of Chicago on the Mississippi.”
“So, what do you do in Massachusetts and Illinois?”
“I keep a watch, is what I do.”
“Okay, you watch something. Mind if I ask you what you watch?”
“Not at all.”
“Look, we’re not connecting here so how about just answering the question?”
“Alright, I will. This country is on the verge of a CCP takeover. Biden and his gang, like the Joint Chiefs of Staff*, are mere pawns of the CCP, and who knows how many hundreds of thousands of PLA operatives (college ‘students’), plus the fact that ‘law enforcement’ will obey whatever orders they are given; it makes this country super vulnerable to relinquishing the Constitution as the law of the land. Heck, you already let in millions of Muslims in what amounts to a degree of surrender; isn’t that right?”
“You got me there. So, let’s dispense with the $5 contest and just go ahead and tell us what you do.”
“Very well. I adjust the light of ‘The Beacon of Freedom,’ but ever since the stolen election I just let it get dimmer and dimmer each day. I haven’t worked for 26 months and a day and every day Katie Hobbs is the de facto governor of Arizona the light gets dimmer. If we don’t do something about it, the light will go out for all of us, Dems and RINOs and everybody else on the planet alike.”
“Well-said. Let’s pause for a short commercial break, shall we?”
“Peter Gunn” (1:49)
“I’d like to say one more thing before I leave. One would expect that your president or vice-president or any one of your elected representatives would be more than welcome on your front porch knocking on your door to ask your opinion on anything. Well, here’s news: Trump, Marjorie Taylor Greene, and Matt Gaetz would be welcome, while I wouldn’t recommend Biden, McConnell, or any of the Swamp Rats to try and set one foot on my front porch or on my lawn. Not one. For real. Very seriously. Let’s add a real honest-to-goodness sleaze, United States Attorney General Merrick Garland, who would receive double because he’s supposed to uphold the law rather than break it.”
“That is so true.”
“I’m not going to mention Merrick Garland’s complicity in the Jan. 6 ‘manufactured insurrection’ while totally ignoring the REAL Jan. 6 insurrection of Mike Judas Pence who certified fraudulent votes under the direction of Nancy Pelosi; no, I’m not.”
“And not one word about the millions from China into the Biden Crime Syndicate?’”
“Not one word, even though the evidence is cut-and-dried.”
“Irrefutable.”
“And nothing about the open border?”
“I’m out of here. Thanks for having me.”
“And thank you for taking the time from your busy schedule to be with us. Let’s take a short break.”
“Justice for All” (2:24)
“And we’re back with our next guest, Miss Dale. Welcome to ‘Pulse,’ the most-watched information show in its time slot.”
“And so glad to be here. I used to watch your broadcast when you were at the train stations outside of Chicago, and then, after the mayor burned your studio, from the General’s den, so I’m a bona fide longtime viewer.”
“That you are. You mentioned some kind of theory of Dark Matter, is that correct?”
“Yes, I heard your broadcast with Professor Wert about gravitational waves having a property that can be weighed if we knew how to weigh it. Well, what about color? Why can’t light have the same? I mean, it’s all in the electromagnetic spectrum, is it not?”
“But of course.”
“So, there you are. Someday someone, maybe not yet born, will figure it all out; so what if it takes a lifetime, or even many lifetimes? The exercise is in the quest; isn’t that the game?”
“I have to agree with you, no doubt, but you can’t have a free exchange of ideas with BIG BROTHER looking over your shoulder, now, can you?”
“No, of course not; can’t be having any ‘Jewish science,’ now, can we?”
“The Deep State wouldn’t like free thinkers. Unfortunately, our time is up so we must wish our viewers and readers a goodnight: Goodnight.
“Good show. The Deep State’s stated agenda is to curtail free speech and we can’t let that happen under any circumstances, which is why we should all be armed with plenty of extra water and ammo on hand for any emergency, be it caused by the hand of God or by the hands of idiots such as Joe Biden, Merrick Garland and the rest of the circus that is driving a stake through Lady Liberty’s heart. The solution is for Biden to come clean and allow President Trump to clean up the mess that the world finds itself in and let’s get on with peace and prosperity, if that is at all possible. Burger time: my treat.”
[*JCS: Maybe someone should clue the JCS in that masks don’t work. They look like fools, and they are, come to think of it: masks or no masks.]
[Update on Henry: Chance of Henry being recalled by Zyklon; will keep you posted.]
[Little People report: Little People have their targets identified; all the rest is nothing but conjecture, but if I were to speculate, I’d say to anyone who had a hand in incarcerating the Jan. 6 peaceful protesters to start getting acclimated to living in GITMO; just sayin’.”]
“To the Aisle” (2:45)
Roving Reporter