by Roving Reporter, ©2023 

(Mar. 20, 2023) — “Trump Won” (3:30)

“Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to ‘The Pulse of the Nation,’ the place to hear it here first. Henry called and said he’d like to make a statement, so here he is. Take it away.”

“Thank you, Roving, for such an in-depth and comprehensive introduction. I was sunbathing on my pad, just relaxing away, when I heard on the news that some nitwit in New York wants to arrest Trump on some bogus ‘who-in-the-heck-cares’ charge. So, this is what I expect my governor to do…”

“Yes, that’s right. You’re a citizen of Florida and Ron DeSantis is your governor.”

“Yes, it’s true that I was born in New Jersey, but I’ve lived and paid my taxes in Florida for a number of years, besides the fact that I have a library card and voter’s registration card from Florida.”

“So, it wasn’t hard for you to get a voter’s registration card?”

“Piece of cake.”

“So, no problems, no roadblocks, even you’re a frog?”

“Nope, as I said, it was easy as pie. Now, getting back to what I was talking about, even the dumbest of us must realize that the 2020 election was a fraud, right? That Trump won and Biden has no business anywhere except in his basement. Okay, we know that much, and we also know that in all honesty, Trump is our president and for the Deep State to be thinking they’re going to arrest Trump is so far out of the realm of reality it’s beyond normal understanding.”

“So, who would be so stupid to understand such a ridiculous notion? Wait, please answer after this short commercial break.”

The One Who Really Loves You” (2:28)

“And we’re back. We were talking about the Dems and the ‘Clot Shot,’ open-border Fentanyl pushers, not to mention the children and young girl sex-slave trade.”

“Anyone who hates the Constitution hates America and is a die-hard proponent of the philosophy of Big Government/Deep State, in other words, those who suffer from ‘Trump Derangement Syndrome.’

“And people who get their news from the Fake News and by watching The View that has yet to apologize for pushing the ‘Russian Collusion Hoax’ year after year. Still waiting to hear their apology.”

“And you’ll be waiting forever.”

“I’m afraid so. Okay, the Deep State is after Trump because Trump wants to destroy the Deep State, just as we all do. I want, no, I expect my governor to do his job and protect the citizens of his state, and in this case that would be Trump. If it takes surrounding Mar-a-Lago* with the National Guard, so be it; I wouldn’t expect anything less. I want my fellow Americans to be protected from the likes of Christopher Wray and Merrick Garland, let alone any nitwit from New York. I want DeSantis to do his job and not take a knee to the CCP; got that?”

“Got it and couldn’t agree with you more.”

“Call it ‘Civil War II’ if you want because we have to start fighting back sometime, somehow. I would like all the bikers to surround Mar-a-Lago, too. We don’t want cops or anyone who got the ‘Clot Shot,’ right?”

“For sure.”

“We want Americans, Veterans and anyone who loves his or her country and hates Socialism, Communism, and Wokeism.”

“I like the idea.”

“Yes, and if anybody tries to arrest my president, well, all I can say is ‘Don’t’; is that good enough?”

“Good enough. Thanks for spouting what we were all thinking. Thank you and so, on behalf of Henry, this is your Roving Reporter wishing each of you a goodnight. Goodnight.

“Good show. Burger for me and I got a can of worms for you.”

[*Mar-a-Lago: I was there, once, in 1997, and asked the help about Trump: they all loved the man, I kid you not.] 

How Blue” (2:41) [The song asks, “Oh, honey, why did you leave me?” The answer is quite simple: if you cheat on your husband, he’ll just pack it up and leave. And the sad part is that he’ll still love you, but no man can take a cheatin’ wife.]

Roving Reporter

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  1. In truth, DeSantis is a swamp rat who only looks after himself and the heck with what’s the right thing to do, in this case, to protect Trump from anyone who is after Trump for some really bogus “we don’t give a hoot” charges so they can take Trump out of the 2024 election.

    So I guess (thanks to DeSantis not giving a hoot) we’ll not rely on the Florida Nation Guard to surround Mar-a-Lago to protect Trump but rather ask the BIKERS OF FLORIDA to do what is right: surround Trump and keep the FEDS or anyone else from wanting to do Trump harm.

    North Korea shooting missiles over Japan, Russia and Ukraine going at it, banks collapsing, inflation rising, open borders is ALL because of the stolen election. Mike Pence, aka Judas, is the real insurrectionist, along with Pelosi, are some of the ones who deserve to be in the gulag. Let’s add the Capitol Police murderers, too.

    I’m sorry, but DeSantis made his bed: let him lie in it.