by Roving Reporter, ©2024
(Dec. 10, 2024) — “Judy in Disguise” (2:47)
“Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to ‘The Pulse of the Nation,’ the place to hear it here first. Bishop Dunkin wrote a play he’d like to share with us. Welcome back to ‘Pulse,’ Bishop. What made you write this particular play?”
“Thank you for having me on the most popular information show in its time slot, Roving.”
“Don’t mention it. So, you wrote a play: why?”
“I wrote this particular play because I got sick and tired of judges thinking that whatever they think, say or decree is always right, never wrong, without question. I beg to differ. The world is not flat, and the earth is not the center of all creation. A judge may accuse a young lady or old woman of being a witch and sentence her to be dunked until drowned, but that does not make her guilty of being a witch since she wasn’t a witch in the first place; how about them apples? A J-Sixer accused of ‘insurrection’ does not mean that person was an insurrectionist, since the real insurrectionists are Nancy Pelosi and Mike Pence.”
“Okay, so you wrote a play about crooked judges; is that it?”
“That’s right, and I have a bunch of well-known characters in it. For example, Henry makes an appearance, as does his troupe of lady ‘Can Can’ (1:09) dancing frogs. ‘Turtle who sits on rock in moonlight’ is also in it, as are a few surprise guests.”
“Can you give us a hint or two of your ‘surprise guests?’”
“For sure. Maybe one just got re-elected.”
“No way. Well, now that is interesting. Where does this play take place?”
“Since this is a play for little kiddies, the play takes place in a faraway land during a faraway time. After all, the play starts off with, ‘Once upon a time in a far, faraway place during a far, faraway time…’”
“I see. How may acts and how long is this play?”
“Little kiddie plays have 2 acts with an extra long intermission for milk, cookies and a nap.”
“I see.”
“Also, little kiddies’ plays make moral judgements plain as day: judges are in black and the good guys in white. Henry wears a white tux, cuts a rather dashing figure.”
“And speaking of Henry, he got passed over for Secretary of Defense. How’d he take it?”
“Like a frog, you know, with a stoic acceptance by croaking, ‘Oh, well.’”
“Yes, of course. How long is the play?”
“Start to finish, including intermission, two hours.”
“How much are the tickets?”
“Kids under 10, free but must be accompanied by an adult; adults, $20. But where we really make out is at the concession stand.”
“Of course. Do you have any judges in the play?”
“Well, there’s quite a few; I mean, Washington, DC and NYC judges, for sure.”
“That figures. So, since judges are fair game, can the United States Attorney General go after these crooked and paid-off judges for using their office illegally?”
“For sure, darn right. I’m glad you asked that because, in the last scene of Act II, a judge is actually arrested and thrown in the Washington gulag, which the little kiddies and adults enjoy because it always gets a standing ovation.”
“I take it the audience doesn’t like crooked judges.”
“Does anybody?”
“No, of course not. Well, I see our time is up, so this is your Roving Reporter, along with Bishop Dunkin, wishing each of you a goodnight: Goodnight.
“Good show. I particularly like the idea of going after the crooked judges. Good luck on your new play. Burger time: my treat.”
“Rocky Mountain High” (4:47)
Roving Reporter