by Roving Reporter, ©2024
(May 27, 2024) — “You’re Sixteen” (2:01)
“Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to ‘The Pulse of the Nation,’ the place to hear it here first. We have a surprise for you, the world’s expert on… Hold it, what’s that noise? Who’s banging on the door? Zork? Well, let him in before he breaks it down. I must say, Professor Zorkophsky, such rude behavior.”
“Sorry about that. Well, not really. Look, I’ve sat on the sidelines long enough, so long, in fact, I can’t sleep at night. Remember the statue-topplers? And remember when the Taliban destroyed those Buddhist statues in Afghanistan? And remember when all those ancient artifacts were destroyed in Palmyra?”
“Matter of fact, yes, we do.”
“You know they’re connected. Maybe not directly, but the results are identical. So, yes, they’re connected. And then we have Oct. 7th and idiots call for a ‘ceasefire’ and ‘Free Palestine.’ You know what I say about that?”
“No, what do you say about that?”
“Humbug.”
“Humbug? What the heck does that mean?”
“It means no one is paying attention, that’s what it means.”
“If you’re going to tell us that our schools are nothing more than Socialist indoctrination centers funded by the terrorists from the Middle East and the Communists from the Far East, we already know.”
“That’s right. You and I know, but those protesting idiots don’t have a clue, so maybe if the IDF would release the 1½ hour or so video of what went down — without blurring — on Oct. 7 to let the truth speak for itself, people will start waking up to the real threat right on our doorstep.”
“You may have a point.”
“Look, they haven’t changed their stripes one iota, no matter what you think, for the past 1,400 years. Every single day in Africa, without exception, Muslims kidnap, torture and murder other human beings, and if they can’t kill a Jew, Christian, Hindu or any other nonbeliever, they’ll murder one of their own, maybe take the wife out into the desert and bury her up to her neck and let the insects, rats and any other animal eat her alive. And maybe pop will hold down the daughter while mom saws off the daughter’s head for ‘looking at a boy’ or going out on the balcony without wearing a hijab; forget she’s only ten years old. Maybe the father will not allow the lifeguard to rescue his drowning daughter because a ‘strange man’ would be touching her. Look, I’m not making up this stupidity. That’s right; we call it crazy while they see no problem with flying planes into buildings. They cheer while we mourn the utter foolish waste of innocent lives (besides the destruction), and then they cheer even louder for our degree of being upset. Sickening.”
“Reminds me of Oct. 7th.”
“Oct. 7 was not a military skirmish. Oct. 7 was the wanton widespread torture and murder of innocent people just for the sake of inflicting as much pain and suffering as possible. Oct. 7, just like 9-11, could have been done anywhere and at any time, and it’ll happen again and again and again.”
“It’ll never end?”
“Not unless they either change their ways, voluntarily or otherwise.”
“They won’t listen to reason?”
“’No Jew between me and the sea’ allows no room for alternative interpretations. There’s no reason for the irrational hatred for other people believing something different than yourself. In every psychological textbook since Genesis, that sort of behavior is set aside for the psychopaths, those who can’t seem to accept a mold of behavior accepted by all to raise a stable family and, therefore, an enduring culture.”
“No hope for them?”
“Don’t feel bad; there never was. This is not a new enemy; it is a very old enemy that needs to be properly dealt with. Let Netanyahu deal with the problem and let’s support Israel 110%.”
“Don’t stop at Gaza?”
“Don’t even slow down. Look, it’s a real easy fix. Just stop the hatred and that’s it. No more acting like fools, okay? Learn the Golden Rule and live with the rest of humanity.”
“That makes sense. What do you say we pause for a commercial?”
“Melissa” (5:37)
“And we’re back with Professor Zorkophsky for a lesson in psychology.”
“Thank you, Roving. For this last segment of the show, I want to talk about rape, if I may. There are many common shared characteristics of a rapist, starting with low self-esteem. Another shared flaw is a manufactured feeling of power, or a domineering attitude, like a little kid stepping on an ant. Okay, we all know a little kid can step on an ant. Big deal; what of it?”
“That sounds about right. What next?”
“Next is what truly makes rape an activity only a psycho could do. Think about it. The purpose of making an offspring is to continue the species, right? Now we all know that the activity can be pleasant, as it should be, but when it is not, for either party, then it is not an act of reproduction but a manifestation of short-circuit in the brain of the rapist. Boasting about rape is an admission that the male lacks the social graces to be accepted by the female, any female.”
“What’s wrong with such people? I mean, how do they get that way?”
“Actually, they are taught to be stupid and cruel, believe it or not. After ISIS captures a town, they drive around and randomly kill whatever they see: dogs, people walking down the sidewalk, driving cars. Just stick the gun out the window and fire away. Male, female, young and old, just kill for the sake of killing. Mentally immature young men – your ant killers – let loose on the world. And each one a psychopath, a serial killer who couldn’t understand the benefits of the Golden Rule if it hit them between the eyes*.”
“Hopeless?”
“Yep. Look, I know you want to believe in the myth that they push, but don’t.”
“What myth? What are you talking about?”
“The myth that ‘they’re all not like that.’ Well, I got news for you. When you get to Heaven and happen to run across Daniel Pearl, ask him about ‘misunderstood’; that way you’ll learn the truth.”
“Some might.”
“Yes, some might. Look, before we sign off I’d like to say a few words about Memorial Day. Our country, the United States of America, was founded on Christian principles, namely the Golden Rule and everything else Jesus taught us. We are a Christian nation, and our Constitution is based on Judeo-Christian principles. Islam and Sharia and Judeo-Christian principles and the Constitution will not mix, like trying to mix oil and water: IT’LL NEVER HAPPEN.”
“I think you’re right. I mean, 1,400 years must account for something, right?”
“One would think so. All I’ve got to say, if we don’t get rid of each and every Muslim from our land, well, you might as well give up, go to a National Cemetery and tell all those graves that each and every one of them served their country in vain. That they suffered, perhaps were maimed and died for nothing. That their time in the military was nothing more than a waste of time.”
“That’s a rather strong statement.”
“But true. But, hey, what do I know? Don’t read history; don’t even read today’s news. They say they are going to out-birth us, out-vote us and replace our Constitution with their Sharia, but no one is listening. The thought of Americans giving up without a fight makes me sick to my stomach. Send the imposter Barry Soetoro, aka Obama, down to GITMO, for starters, and maybe the rest will leave on their own accord.”
“It’ll never happen, will it?”
“Nope. All I can say is go visit a national cemetery and let them know that we lost it for them, that we don’t have what it takes, that the ‘Greatest Generation’ of Americans was the last before the last.”
“Before the last? What’s that supposed to mean?”
“It means we’re the last, the last generation of Americans, the generation that didn’t have the gumption, the brains and the will to save our Republic.”
“So, we give up?”
“No, of course not. We elect people with brains, get rid of the slime such as AOC, Omar and Tlaib. And buy guns to protect yourself and not rely on cops and FBI agents who have no problem following illegal orders. And I’ll say one more thing: if nothing else, at least give a minute to contemplate the meaning of Memorial Day.”
“Good advice. Okay, this is your Roving Reporter, along with Professor Zorkophsky, wishing you all a goodnight: Goodnight.
“Real men don’t rape; only cowards rape. Anybody who supports rape is just as depraved as the cowardly rapists and deserves whatever comes their way. People ask me what the chances of us are of getting it right. I answer, ‘What do you think? Well, what do you think? Burger time: my treat.”
[*Between the eyes: I say that we live by the Golden Rule, but that also means treating other people the way they would want to treat you before they get the chance. In other words, do to them before they do whatever they want to do to you.]
[Kneelers, in my mind, accomplish as much destruction to our way of life as the statue- topplers and the idiots who support Hamas with the made-up ‘Free Palestine’ bunk. And if any of you are still viewers of professional sports who seem to have no problem with ‘kneelers,’ think again.]
[Open Border: Child trafficking 101.]
[Open Border: Rape trees 101.]
[Open Border: The destruction of America.]
[Open Border: Biden, YES; Trump, NO.]
[‘Pulse’ supports any law enforcement officer who upholds their Oath to the Constitution, as should we all. The FBI and the men and women in blue who took part in the raid on Roger Stone’s house and Mar-a-Lago are what we would call Pelosi’s ‘American Terrorists’ and not the PTA moms.]
[You want the truth? The truth is, we’re just as stupid, blind and helpless as the partygoers were in Israel on Oct. 7. How does that make you feel? Safe?]
[As Ted Nugent says, if you go around without a weapon you’re unarmed and helpless, just as the partygoers on Oct. 7th were. Don’t be helpless.”
“A World Without Love” (2:39)
Roving Reporter