by Pastor Dunkin, ©2026
(Jan. 30, 2026) — “We all know what bad behavior looks like; we see it anytime there’s an ANTIFA protest; we see it anytime Chuck Schumer or Ilhan Omar open their mouths; and we see it when our very own representatives ignore what we the people say: WE DO NOT WANT MUSLIMS IN OUR COUNTRY.”
“Ballad of Davy Crockett” (2:14)
“And that’s my opening. Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to ‘The Pulse of the Nation,’ the place to hear it here first. I’ve always admired our frontiersmen, those who paved the way for us, those who cleared the land and eked out a living in a log cabin heated by fire. Professor ‘Zork’ Zorkophsky spent the last few weeks in a cabin in Tennessee and wishes to tell us about his ordeal. So, Zork, what gives?”
“I’ll tell ya, it wasn’t just your normal winter storm that hit us last weekend, and it wasn’t just wind and snowdrifts; it was much worse than all the above.”
“What happened?”
“Ice is what happened. Ice everywhere, on trees and limbs that cracked and fell, breaking power lines; on power lines, breaking them; covering electrical substations shorting out the works, and on electrical transformers shorting out the works so a million were without power.”
“But surely you had a standby generator?”
“That I do, but it doesn’t work, and I’ve been putting off fixing it.”
“How long have you had it?”
“I think somewhere in the neighborhood of eight years, maybe a little longer.”
“So what happened?”
“So, what happened was at the beginning of this winter I decided that I would heat the cabin only with my wood stove. Ever see those old motion pictures of pioneers living out in the middle of nowhere always chopping wood? Here it is, in the middle of summer, and they’ll be out chopping wood. Always chopping wood. Now I know why: when it’s cold you go through a lot of wood in a hurry.”
“What does the temperature have to be to be ‘cold?’”
“Well, 10° will do, but 24 with a breeze or 27 with a wind also counts. I try and maintain 68 and above at the stove, an old Franklin-type one. I learned that packing it loose is better than stuffing it in. You just have to accept the fact that at 3:00 a.m. you’re going to throw a few logs in, so get used to it.”
“So, without electricity your pump doesn’t work. What do you do about water?”
“Go out and chop ice to melt on the stove to flush the toilet. No showers or washing machine. Better have plenty of bottled water for drinking and cooking.”
“Speaking of cooking?”
“Well, always have a pot on the stove to provide humidity because cold winter air is very dry and you don’t want static electricity. And then have the tea kettle on for coffee, tea or hot chocolate; also to make emergency meals with: you know, those packets to mix with four cups of boiling water.”
“How are they, those survival packs?”
“East, hot and somewhat good. I mean, not the greatest, but better than peanut butter and crackers.”
“Any last words?”
“I’m saying nobody ever complained about having too much firewood.”
“And with that we’ll be taking a short break; be right back.”
“North to Alaska” (2:48)
“And we’re back. I want to say a few things on my mind. First, let the Dems have their way and we’ll be like France in six months. Let the Dems have their way and we’ll be so far gone as to never get back. This ANTIFA charade in Minneapolis has got to stop. I say everyone protesting ICE needs to be locked up, in jail for a minimum of one year with the option of knowledge of the Constitution to be freed in six months.
“Second subject on my mind is to execute child-molesters, rapists and murderers regardless of their immigration status. Will that affect the current treaties where the guilty are from? So what?
“And lastly, how about springing Tina Peters? The only reason she’s in jail is that she saved proof of election cheating, which is a good thing. She backed up her computer; big deal. We have Special Forces; use them and, on their way, arrest all those who had a hand in railroading Tina Peters, and do it today, for Heaven’s sake, for our sake, for the sake of our Republic.
“A last note to the idiot protesters of ICE: if you want more Angel Moms, move to North Korea, please, because if you get in my face about it, you’ll wish you had. Yes, I know I’m a pastor and teach the Golden Rule, but that doesn’t mean I have to take what The View dishes out or, for that matter, anyone infested with TDS, specifically ANTIFA useful idiots.
“Oh, my, will you look at the time? Well, we’ll just have to have our featured guest rescheduled is all there is to it. To be a registered Democrat is a call for help from the unhinged. This is Pastor Dunkin wishing each of you a goodnight: Goodnight.
“Another great show. If you were here, I’d invite you for a burger: my treat.”