by Roving Reporter, ©2025
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(Apr. 17, 2025) — “(You Make Me Feel) A Natural Woman” (3:50)
“Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to ‘The Pulse of the Nation,’ the place to hear it here first. We’ve received numerous requests for another interview from our favorite General; that’s right, the one who wheels his chalkboard wherever he goes. Welcome aboard ‘Pulse,’ the most-watched information show in its time slot.”
“And thank you for having me on your most popular show. I’m not going to make one mention of you being out of uniform or looking like a civilian, which is your basic slob. I must say, you seem to take pride in looking as you do. I would think that you would embrace your position on television to act like a military man by being ‘four-point-oh,’ shipshape, ready for inspection. I once promoted you and now I’m demoting you. But, as I said, I’m not going to say one word about the whole sordid mess.”
“Thank you, General; I really appreciate that. Before we went on air, you said something about invading the British Isles; did I hear you right?”
“No, Roving, you did not hear me right. I said, ‘We ought to invade England.’ We need to set the record straight; I mean, we have the power, so why not use it?”
“I’m confused: why do we need to invade England?”
“Where you been, to Mars? They put the one person who wasn’t afraid to speak the truth in prison; now what do you think about that?”
“No way. Why would they want to do that?”
“Because of payoffs, that or stupidity. I guess, come to think of it, one is about the same as the other. You see, Tommy Robinson is the voice of common sense, the voice of reason, the voice of what is right vs. what is most terribly wrong in England and, furthermore, the whole European Union today. They had to silence him; okay, fine; we’ll just invade them and free Tommy. Nobody has to get hurt or die; fair enough?”
“Sounds fair enough to me.”
“Back in the 2012 presidential election, there was this one candidate who said, if elected, he would use our military to invade Canada and expel the Muslims, and then go across the pond and do the same for the British Isles and then go on through Europe. Too bad he wasn’t elected in 2012.”
“No doubt about it. Whatever happened to him?”
“I don’t know; just faded into the woodwork, I guess. Just think of how the world would look today if he were elected back in 2012. Anyway, that’s all I wanted to say. Now, if you’ll turn your attention to my chalkboard, I have the whole battle plan drawn out for you. These blue squares represent carrier groups. Now, as you can see, we have one in the North Sea and one stationed just West of England in the pond.”
“The ‘pond?’”
“The Atlantic Ocean. Now these little ‘x’s’ are transport planes ready to carry the Muslims back to where they came from, free of charge. If they don’t leave now, then they’ll have the option to swim home.”
“Fair enough. I understand you are heading to the Pentagon for some important meetings, so we’ll let you go. Thank you for the battle plans and we hope it all works out. I mean, if they’ll just hand Tommy Robinson over to us and England, Ireland and the whole lot of them can drown under their upcoming Sharia Law. The heck with them, but I think we really ought to go over there and save them once again. It’s break time but stick around, because we have a treat for you.”
“Aline” (2:50)
“And we’re back with our surprise guest, Henry. How you doin’, Henry, and what have you got for us?”
“Peachy, Roving, and you?”
“The same.”
“Ever notice there are two states that are on the ocean, one on the Atlantic, the other on the Pacific, that are equally wacky, that are completely out-of-touch with reality as to be, heck, back in the day before woman suffrage, back in the time when cave men would walk around with clubs to get a mate? Maine and California are woke and wish to stay woke. They are anti-female to the degree that they’ve certainly paved the way for a clitorectomy as being required to attend public school, a requirement set for the ignorant masses, the proletariat among us.”
“That’s a mouthful. So, you think that this ‘gender identity’ is what?”
“Mental illness pushed by stupid parents, for starters. Here’s the thing: gender ‘reassignment’ is just another name that big business use as an excuse to make big money. If you think of a hospital as a ‘money factory’ you’ll be right on target. By the same token, if you think of a doctor as being a ‘body mechanic,’ you’ll be correct. If you think of the COVID-19 ‘vaccine’ as a CLOT SHOT, a myocarditis inducer, you’ll be right again. If you think that hospitals made money by killing people during the fake pandemic, you are one smart cookie. And if you didn’t fall victim to the hype about getting the so-called ‘vaccine,’ then you’re not what the CCP or the Dems want as a member of their party. Just as in Islam, those who question are not welcome.”
“Interesting. I mean, think about it, Maine and California, the farthest states from the Bible Belt. Coincidence?”
“As they say on RAV, ‘There are no conspiracies, but there are NO coincidences.’”
“Very well. And that’ll do it for this episode. I’d like to thank my guests, the General and Henry, for making the show so enjoyable: Goodnight.
“Good show. The General had to leave, but we have a rubber plant over there in the corner that I’m sure will have some nice juicy worms for you, Henry. I’m grabbing a burger.”
“Seven Nation Army” (4:31)
Roving Reporter