by Roving Reporter, ©2025
(Jan. 13, 2025) — “Last Night” (3:45)
“Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to ‘The Pulse of the Nation,’ the place to hear it here first. Bishop Dunkin requested to make a statement, so take it away, Bishop Dunkin.”
“Thank you, Roving, for giving me the opportunity to say what we’re all thinking: ‘You loot, we shoot.’ Jesus never said to go through life stupid. He never said to accept victimhood. Today there are two kinds of people in the United States: those who accept the Constitution as the law of the land and those who are just plain stupid.”
“Did you say ‘stupid?’ Surely you could be a little more forgiving.”
“I’m afraid not, Roving. We’ve given the enemy everything they’ve asked for, including the ‘time of day,’ and all they’ve given us in return is molesting our children, raping our women, robbing us blind, torturing and murdering us and we say no more. We say we’ve given them the proverbial inch and they’ve taken the proverbial mile.”
“Well, I must say you got that part right.”
“Gangs of Spanish-speaking bums are attacking soon-to-be-abandoned and recently- abandoned homes from the Los Angeles fire. We do not condone violence, but equally, we do not condone surrender. Remember, America is a nation of laws, and lawbreakers need to receive justice. In a Blue State it is obvious that the police seem to be on the side of the criminals. California and Los Angeles are as Blue as it gets so I guess that answers any questions about help.”
“The Dems reap what they sow; is that what you’re trying to tell us?”
“What I’m trying to tell you is that the behavior of the goons in California will be the behavior of all America unless we take the bull by the horns and do whatever must be done to get out country back on track. In the 1950s there were maybe ten serial killers; today there are thousands. Now, some of today’s murderers may have different motives from those in the past, but nevertheless, murder is murder no matter what it’s called, even ‘honor killings.’”
“You’re right, of course. You got any more for us?”
“United States citizens, legal United States citizens have the right to be armed, so be armed; exercise your constitutional rights.”
“Okay, it seems we’re done. Thanks for the warning. This is your Roving Reporter, along with Bishop Dunkin, wishing all of you a goodnight: Goodnight.
“Good show. Burger time: my treat.”
[Reminder: While California is burning, remember Maui.]
“Ring of Fire” (2:41)
Roving Reporter