by Roving Reporter, ©2024
(Sep. 1, 2024) — “Five O’Clock World” (2:10)
“Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to ‘The Pulse of the Nation,’ the place to hear it here first. We received a call from one of our contributors warning us something about ‘sheep’s clothing’ which piqued our interest, so may I present Henry, the talking frog. Welcome back to ‘Pulse,’ the most-watched information show in its time slot. You said you had something to say about Labor Day; the floor is yours.”
Bursting through the studio door are a dozen frogs dressed as Can-Can girls to the traditional music of “The Can Can Song” (2:21). At the conclusion of the song the lady frogs exit.
“What the heck was that all about?”
“It’s my troupe I travel with, is what it is. Gets people’s attention, trust me.”
“Oh, there’s no doubt about that. Now tell us about the history of Labor Day, could you, so that, please, minus the fanfare?”
“Of course, but I’d like to take this opportunity to sing a song, if I may.”
“Only if you tell us the history of Labor Day afterwards.”
“It’s a deal.”
Henry hops on the microphone and begins to sing.
“When You Wish Upon a Star” (1:45)
“Why, that was beautiful, Henry.”
“Thank you, Mr. Roving. Excuse me while I reach in my backpack and pull out a grasshopper. Gulp.”
“A bit lacking in table manners, I suppose, but I guess your behavior is considered excellent frog etiquette.’”
“But of course, Mr. Roving. The first Labor Day honoring the working class started in New York City in the year 1882 and became a federal holiday in 1894. The Labor Day in September is really the second Labor Day of the year, the first is celebrated on May 1st by the Communists. The September Labor Day has morphed into a day of hot dogs and BBQs, yet another day for federal employees to get paid for a day without work.”
“So, it’s not a day for the business owner?”
“Nor the musician, the homeless or anyone serving in the armed forces. The NAVY, for instance, doesn’t take the day off.”
“Yes, of course. Well, Henry, thank you for explaining that we’re celebrating a Communist holiday this Labor Day.”
“Always glad to help.”
“And always glad to have you on our show. Alright, this is your Roving Reporter, along with Henry, wishing each of you a goodnight: Goodnight.
“Good show. You have more grasshoppers in your backpack? Good; I’ll have a burger. You want to sing the closing song? By all means. Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Henry.”
“Nessun Dorma” (4:31)