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by OPOVV, ©2020

jenszhonk, Pixabay, License

(Jul. 16, 2020) — “Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to ‘The Pulse of the Nation,’ the place to hear it here first. It’s a beautiful day and things are getting back to normal, at least as far as foot traffic to the railway platform across the street goes. Hello, my name is Roving, as in Roving Reporter (RR), and I work for a small independent television station that used to be picked-up by satellite, but a contract dispute ended that a couple of years ago when I refused to work for free, so now I’m working for peanuts. Win some; lose some. Anyway, what we do is conduct street interviews – live – and our secretary, Molly, transcribes the show, after cutting inappropriate words, and emails it to The Post & Email News, where it is further edited, mainly for copyright infringements and other such legalities. And here comes our first customer of the day; excuse me, sir, Roving for ‘Pulse’; care to be interviewed on live TV?”

“Where’s the camera? That’s the camera? And what’s that squirrel-looking thing above my head?”

“We’re what we call shoestring, and that thing above your head is a microphone covered by a wind sock.”

“Are you people for real?”

“Yes, we are and have been on TV for almost a decade.”

“What’s a ‘decade?’”

“Ten years.”

“Black lives matter.”

“What’s your point?”

“I want to hear you say, ‘Black lives matter’; that’s my point.”

“See that man standing over there, about twenty yards away, the one with the cowboy hat on? Go ask him your question. His name is Chief New Leaf, by the way.”

“I ain’t talkin’ to no Indian. Now I want you to kneel and apologize for your white privilege.”

“Ever been in the military? I thought not because there is absolutely no privilege for anyone going through Boot Camp; trust me, and for you to say such a meaningless phrase just shows to me how out-of-touch you are with reality.”

“Cops are killing us.”

“Let me see if I got this right. Blacks are, what, 13% of the population yet do about 90% of the crime; now why do you think that is? If you don’t want cops around, don’t do the crime.”

“Say what?”

“President Lyndon Johnson, a Democrat, really did a job by introducing a Welfare system that encourages having babies out of wedlock – marriage – and if the father is hanging around then the mother gets less money per month for any kid she has.”


“So two things happened: one is kids raised without a father and, for some reason, disrespect for women, which is why there are so many teen pregnancies. You know there’s been millions of abortions in the last twenty years, and most of them were minorities?”

“You got money and stuff.”

“Only because we wake up at four in the morning, make it to the studio by five, get our assignment, load the van and take to the road to get here by six and get set-up by half-past. Sometimes we drive to the university to interview Professor Zorkophsky or drive to the airport to fly down to Florida to interview Madam Shylock, and then fly back and back to the studio where we load what we shot and try and make a show out of what we recorded, all in the same day.”

“But you have privileges.”

“We have to wait for the red-light the same as anyone else; same goes for the railroad-crossing gate.”

“Well, America is a racist country and I kneel when the anthem is played, so there.”

“And people died giving you that right, yet you show no respect; now that sure as heck is disrespect if I ever saw it, which is why Colin Kaepernick will forever be branded as a total loser, a nobody, a no-account, a nonentity, a non-consequential citizen, meaning that he made himself meaningless in the hierarchy of the United States of America.”

“What the heck does that mean?”

“Think of our country as a ship. Well, everybody on the ship is in the chain-of-command in case something happens:  maybe the bridge is taken out and everyone killed, so there’s a chain of command, so the next-in-line has to take command, that’s what I’m saying, so Kaepernick is at the end of the line, like last; get it?”

“Voter ID is racist, that’s what.”

“True or False: do you have to have an ID to get an EBT card?”


“I’ll take that as a ‘yes.’ Do you have to have an ID to open a bank account, maybe to have direct deposit?”


“Another ‘yes.’ So how about explaining to the viewers about ‘racism’ again? You put yourself in a sub-culture that you can’t crawl out of. You talk Ebonics and expect to have managerial positions; you are 13% of the population but are in 90% of the television commercials. Our country is being taken over and you are being used, you a being played like puppets. You can’t support Trump because you can’t understand that we’re one country and believe that somehow you are separate. Well, let me tell you a fact of life: the Civil War is over and you lost; you’re free so you have to go out and get a job and pay taxes like the rest of us. Welcome to the club.”

“I don’t like you.”

“You never acquired a work ethic but what’s even worse, you never acquired a respect for women, which is why you’re so easily recruited into The Nation of Islam,’ an organization which reminds me of the Boy Scouts: not really Islam, just a stepping stone to a nationwide Jihad, which is the whole point: you’re being played just as the North Vietnamese/Chinese Communists played Jane Fonda.”

“I don’t understand a word you’re saying.”

No-longer-here, Pixabay

“Islam is spreading in populations that have no respect for women, and for proof just look at any county that has a ‘Macho’ culture. As far as the USA goes, that is any minority population that disrespects women. Unfortunately, there are just too many examples of the term ‘ladylike’ going by the way of the buggy whip.”

“What’s that you say about ‘whip?’”

“I say it’s time for you to grow up or go through life being used by people who really don’t care if you live or die. And don’t even try and use that childish ploy of reparations*, as if begging for a handout that you didn’t earn. Thanks for taking the time to talk with us. That’ll do it for this episode and so, on behalf of the crew, I’ll be wishing you all a goodnight: Goodnight.

‘Good show. Burger time: my treat.”

[*Reparations: the truth of the matter is that, at one time or other, every group of people has been a slave of every other group. The Roman Empire was built upon the backs of slaves, yet those same people were once the slaves of Africans. Egypt had slaves; the Vikings had slaves; the English, and the list goes on to the beginning of time, through every African, South American and Australian people.

Now, as far as statues go, replace those that were destroyed and learn to live with a view of the world that may be at odds with your own. I have a relative, a great-grandfather or a great-great uncle – I have a portrait of him hanging in my office in uniform — who served in the Michigan Volunteers, yet I respect the statue of Nathan Bedford Forrest, a Confederate general.]

[Note to the Hopping Madpolitical party members: the meeting has been changed to next Wednesday; same time and place.]

[Last Note: Pelosi endorses jihad Jew-hating Rep. Omar for re-election.]

Norwegian Wood” (2:04)


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