by Henry, ©2025
(Dec. 18, 2025) — “In the Year 2525” (3:16)
“Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to ‘The Pulse of the Nation,’ the place to hear it here first. Our featured guest is Professor Wert who is here to hawk his latest book, ‘Space Explorers from Earth.’ Quite a powerful title, Professor. Is it a little kiddie book like your others?”
“Thank you for allowing me to hawk my latest book. The story takes place one billion years from now and, yes, I suppose you could call it a little kiddie book.”
“Sounds like a real thriller. So, the human race is still reaching for the stars?”
“Oh, no, the human race exterminated itself after the Trump administration failed to kick the Muslims out of America back in 2025. A BILLION years is a mighty long time. The spaceship’s crew is made up of octopuses and elephants, who, at least in my book, speak English.”
“That’s a strange combination.”
“You’re telling me.”
“How’d you come up with octopuses and elephants?”
“Easy: I picked the smartest ones around, although the brains behind the whole ‘explore’ exercise was the combined intelligence of the world’s mosquitoes.”
“But how can mosquitoes control anything?”
“Think a googolplex of mosquitoes thinking the same thought at the same time, is how.”
“But…”
“No ‘buts’; it’s the combined thought waves that make it possible for the transference of ideas and commands.”
“Commands too?”
“Why not? Heck, the mosquitoes could be controlling us now, for all we know.”
“I think it’s time for a short commercial break.”
“Elephant Walk” (2:41)
“And we’re back with the well-loved author of children’s books, Professor Wert. You used to travel the globe; what happened?”
“Flying is what happened. DEI pilots, shoddy plane maintenance and the public’s nonchalant attitude about flying.”
“What do you mean about the public’s attitude?”
“They dress as if they’re riding a bus, is what I mean. How about having a little respect for your fellow travelers, is all I’m asking, which they don’t and is why I don’t fly anymore. If I’m scheduled for a conference, I do it on the phone these days.”
“Well, if anything else, it saves money.”
“Saves a lot of money and a lot of hassle and time.”
“I’m sure it does. What’s your take on the Fake News supporting sanctuary cities?”
“The gloves are off, but the DOJ is afraid to step into the ring. We have millions of illegals that need to go back where they came from, but our federal government is reluctant to lift a finger. Look, the fight for State’s Rights lost; it was called the Civil War. The result is that federal law overrides state law. End of the story.”
“What about Tina Peters, the county clerk who discovered voter fraud?”
“Really? I’d send our troops in and free her, put her up in the Lincoln Room in the White House where she can receive the best medical care she deserves, is what I’d do in a heartbeat.”
“And we couldn’t agree with you any more than we already do. And that’s all the time we have for this episode of ‘Pulse,’ the most-watched information show in its time slot. This is Henry, along with Professor Wert, wishing all of you a goodnight: Goodnight.
“Good show. Burger time: my treat.”
“The Night Before Christmas” (2:48)
Henry