by Henry, ©2025
(Sep. 19, 2025) — “Crazy Frog” (2:51)
“Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to ‘The Pulse of the Nation,’ the place to hear it here first. We are proud to welcome a new contributor to ‘Pulse’ who will take over ‘The Pond’ desk – Europe, Africa and the Middle East – from Professor Wert. I am proud to introduce you to ‘Dafney the Duck.’ Welcome aboard, Dafney.”
“Thank you, Henry. I am very proud to be part of your most-watched show in its time slot.”
“Very good, Dafney, I’ve got a feeling you’re going to fit right in. Will you please tell our viewers a little about yourself?”
“Sure thing, mate. I was hatched in Casterbridge, England, and learned to swim in the River Frome in Dorchester, which is a stone’s throw away from the English Channel. When I was very young, I flew all over Europe, over the Med and all around Africa. What.”
“What?”
“It’s the way we speak the English, what. Old man.”
“I see. Well, the things we learn. What are you going to give us in your first report? By the way, where are you?”
“I’m reporting from Leeds Castle in Kent, between London and Dover, and after the interview I’m taking a dip in the moat. We ducks believe that Zork’s ex-wife was the reincarnation of one of Henry VIII’s wives. And here’s my report: England, that’s saying the home-grown people of the British Isles, welcomed President Trump and First Lady Melania with open arms and open hearts. It was refreshing to see such an outpouring of love and hope.”
“I understand the love, but the hope?”
“The people here know that their politicians can’t or won’t save them from the Muslim invasion. They remember the 2012 presidential election in America where one of the candidate’s platforms was to use the US ARMY to rid the USA of Muslims, then go directly into Canada and do the same there, then to Ireland, Scotland, Wales and England and then on to Norway and then across Sweden and all of Europe. They remember and hope and pray that we have the brains to save Western Civilization because, just as in World War II, we’re their last chance.”
“So, that’s the way it is. Well, don’t hold your breath because our Department of Homeland Security couldn’t care less about our country’s future.”
“You mean they’re not going to deport Omar?”
Commercial inserted by the editor.
“Sukiyaki” (4:48)
“No, Dafney, they are not.”
“Why not? What are they afraid of?”
“I really don’t know. Money? Who knows? Maybe they think they’re acting like good Christians leading the sheep to the chopping block; who knows? But it’s not complicated, really.”
“How so?”
“Remember what the Jews said after WWII.”
“’If someone says that they’re going to kill you, believe them.’ I’m right, aren’t I?”
“You are. But the gullible Americans believe a person has the right to tell you that they are going to behead you, rape your wife and daughter and get away with it. They call it ‘FREE SPEECH.’ You can’t yell ‘Fire!’ in a crowded theater but you can yell, ‘I’ll behead nonbelievers!’ It doesn’t make a lick of sense, does it?”
“No, it doesn’t, which is why we all need to be armed, for real: shotgun, rifle and handgun for everyone in the household over 18, at the minimum; extras are good. Speaking from experience, you can never have too much ammo and, more importantly, too much water. And if you’ve got to lug it all, ammo and water, give water the preeminent consideration.”
“Yes, we all agree with everything that’s been said. I’m afraid our time is up, so this is Henry, along with Dafney, who just completed her successful maiden appearance, wishing all of you a goodnight: Goodnight.
“Good show. I’ve got a bucket of worms I’m willing to share.”
[I noticed Mike Pence was back in the news, the Judas.]
“The Duck Song” (3:11)
Henry