by Roving Reporter, ©2024
(Aug. 21, 2024) — “Somebody Done Somebody Wrong Song” (3:26)
“Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to ‘The Pulse of the Nation,’ the place to hear it here first. We mourn for the good people of the British Isles that are suffering for the bad decisions of their lawmakers allowing the invasion of the Muslim mob to take over their country.
“The powers that be allowed for the illegal immigration of millions of freeloaders who will never contribute except being the last nail in the Socialists’ coffin, about to render the British Isles yet another Third World Islamic cesspool. With us to explain it all is our featured guest, Professor Wert. Welcome to ‘Pulse,’ the most popular information program in its time slot.”
“And thank you for inviting me. I visited Merry Old England a few years ago and I had a really good time. Food was terrible and they are allergic to ice, believe it or not.”
“Did you say ice?”
“They don’t like ice. They have some kind of phobia against ice.”
“Give us an example.”
“There was a little café about a block away from my hotel and I ordered a sandwich and a drink. Drink arrived but no ice. I asked for some ice, please, and she said it came out of the machine cold. The next day when I asked for ice, she put one cube in. Never went back.”
“You mentioned the food.”
“Right. One night I decided to treat myself, according to the Michelin Travel Guide, to ‘a memorable epicurean experience’ at one of the four-star restaurants in London. Guess what? The ‘delicious steak from Scotland’ was tough as nails, which made me miss a Texas cow [“G.I. Blues” (2:36)]. Having traveled around the world while in the NAVY – even went through the Panama Canal — I learned that if you have a limited time to spend somewhere, do the bus tours where you see many sights, and if you want to spend more time in one, go back the next day.”
“Getting back to London…”
“Oh, yes. I don’t care if you live in Africa, Indonesia, even in Antarctica: no one — well, almost no one anywhere — could ever condone the slaughter of three little girls for any reason.”
“What about the slaughter of the innocents on Oct. 7th?”
“That counts, for sure that counts, and the only people on our planet that would, one, do such a thing and, two, celebrate such an insane act – I say ‘insane act’ because the people who would commit such a heinous crime and take pleasure in such a horrible deed – would be done only by the certifiably legally insane. In other words, anybody who would act so depraved, leaving his human credentials at the door and rendering himself ripe for execution, forget the arrest and trial.”
“But isn’t that what Israel is trying to do in Gaza?”
“I certainly hope so; go after them to the ends of the earth. Do not leave one stone unturned; go to Tehran and Doha, the capital of Qatar, if necessary.
“Exactly.”
“So why would anyone carry a Hamas flag, as I’ve seen in NYC; Washington, DC, and at the DNC convention in Chicago?”
“Stupid people supporting insanity is the closest I can explain it. Look, it’s so bad in the UK that if a person exercises free speech, to jail he goes. If a Muslim threatens murder, nothing happens. It’s disgusting, seeing a once-proud nation driven to its knees.”
“Is there any hope for those poor people, any at all?”
“I actually doubt it.”
“What happened? I mean, when was the turning point when the fight for freedom was lost and Sharia took over?”
“It was the day Lee Rigby was murdered on the streets on London, May 22, 2013. Rigby was a drummer and machine gunner in the army, and he was run down on the sidewalk, beheaded by a couple of Muslims, and the English didn’t do one darn thing about it. Nobody was deported when every Muslim in the present and ex-British Empire should have been jailed or deported but, unbelievably, nothing was done to make the streets safer for anyone on the whole darn planet, I kid you not.”
“Excuse us while we take a short commercial break.”
“Greensleeves” (2:04)
“Illegal immigration will sink the Islands of England, Wales, Scotland, and the Irish, just as Islam will sink Europe and the North American continent. There is no doubt about it and, you know what? The CCP thinks they can control Islam, but they can’t; they’ll go down just like everyone else, no exceptions.”
“Won’t they be surprised.”
“I’m sure they will.”
“Any last words?”
“If Trump doesn’t deport them all, what’s the point?”
“Good point. Do we go down this year or maybe the next? And that’ll do it for this episode. Sad about the people in the United Kingdom, isn’t it, though? They have one chance and one chance only: if the King of England, Charles III, the Lion of England, would BE A KING, they will be saved, but don’t hold your breath. I don’t believe King Charles has what it’ll take to save his country, just as many Canadians, Australians and Americans don’t have it. Gert Wilders has it; Henry has it; the employees and contributors of ‘Pulse’ have it.”
“Yes, that’s for sure. That’s about it. Madam Shylock’s bit of advice is giving a person part of your time is more important than giving that same person a part of your money. This is your Roving Reporter, along with Professor Wert, wishing you all good luck and a goodnight: Goodnight.
“Good show. Burger time: my treat.”
“Mississippi Blues” (3:42)