by Roving Reporter, ©2021
(Dec. 2, 2021) — “Theme from MASH” (2:52)
“Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to ‘The Pulse of the Nation,’ the place to hear it here first. Today’s guest is Tippi Smith, a dual activist, champion of the rights of animals as well as people. Welcome to ‘Pulse,’ the most-watched information show in its time slot.”
“Glad to be here and thank you for inviting me.”
“Tell us, in your own words – I always wanted to say that – about your editorial to one of the popular political blogs, the one comparing two monsters who got their kicks torturing the helpless. One tortured humans and the other humans and helpless little Beagle puppies.”
“No, Roving, I will not soil your reputation nor that of ‘Pulse’; it’s just too horrible what Fauci does to cute little puppies. It makes me sick, what Fauci approves. The guy is sick, just as sick as Dr. Mengele, and both will share the same standing as two of the most totally reprehensible characters in history.”
“Well-said. Anything to add?”
“There is no ‘pandemic’: there is only a Chinese biological warfare weapon that our government is embracing to suspend freedoms, but as long as we have our weapons we have a chance to take our country back. And as long as you asked, the Fake News is the biggest enemy we have, and since the Fake News and the government are one, well, enough said. Thank you for having me on. It was fun. See you.”
“And off she goes and so will we. Be right back after this short break.”
“Our Day Will Come” (2:32)
“And we’re back with Sandy Peel, the head honcho of the county’s Republican Party.”
“Ex-head.”
“Pardon me?”
“I quit because there is no Republican Party anymore; it changed to the ‘Republican/Democrat Socialist Party.’ Most of them are a bunch of cowards – not all, mind you. So I quit. And I brought you a present.”
“Thank you; what is it?”
“Unroll it.”
“Why, it’s a poster. Here, you take this side and I’ll take the other and we’ll hold it up for the camera. How about describing it for our reading audience?”
“Very well. On the left is a health worker, in a white uniform with a white hat with the words ‘THE JAB,’ holding a syringe, actually pointing the syringe. Now standing behind her is a man in a suit holding a briefcase with a ‘DOJ’ sticker; next to him is a man wearing a blue windbreaker with yellow letters spelling ‘FBI’ aiming a shotgun at the people on the right.”
“Very good. And what about the people on the right, standing on the front porch?”
“There’s a man pointing a revolver — at the syringe – and behind him is his wife in curlers and then two kids holding on to her bathrobe.”
“Tell us with the caption is, the words on the bottom.”
“’SECOND AMENDMENT PROTECTING LIFE AND LIBERTY’”
“Would you, by any chance, be the designer of this poster?”
“Yes, matter of fact I am. I pasted some photographs together and added some color. How do you like it?”
“I think it’s great. Is it for sale? I’d like to buy one and blow it up; it would make a good backdrop, don’t you think?”
“This one’s on the house.”
“Alright, for sure. And thank you and we’ll be right back to say goodnight.”
“You Never Even Called Me By My Name” (5:20)
“Well, it has been another great show.”
“Excuse me, but I’d like to say something.”
“I’m sorry; we just ran out of time and are saying our goodnights.”
“Wait a minute, will you? I’d just like to say that some day, I hope, I’ll see one of those Dems or RINOS in an elevator, that’s all.”
“You’re not threatening violence or anything like that, because we don’t allow violence on ‘Pulse,’ a family show.”
“Oh, no, not me. See you around.”
“Okay, now it is the time to say goodnight, and thanks for watching: Goodnight.
“Good show. Burger time: my treat.”
[Little People report: Continues to be on a communications blackout.]
“Send in the Clowns” (2:42)