“LEARNING FROM THE PAST”
by OPOVV, ©2020
(Feb. 16, 2020) — “Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to where truth is to be found: ‘The Pulse of the Nation.’ Hello, my name is Roving, as in Roving Reporter (RR), and I will be your host where we’re once again broadcasting from Professor Zorkophsky’s office here at the university. Another bestseller, Professor Zorkophsky?”
“Yes, I’m proud to say. And if you don’t mind, Roving, please address me as ‘Zork’ since we’re in my rather unique office. Speaking of which, I have a couple of new additions if you’re interested.”
“For sure, Zork, but first let’s delve into your latest bestseller.”
“Very well, as you insist. It’s written as a textbook yet it could be read as a play or even a movie.”
“So you wrote another screenplay?”
“Disguised as a textbook for the masses, the amateur historian, the layman.”
“In other words, for everyone.”
“For sure. It starts off as a cautionary tale about things wished for but not earned and it goes downhill from there.”
“Could you be a tad more specific?”
“It’s about the Little People who live in the northern reaches of Adirondack Park and the events that caused them to be little, but it’s written as a parable.”
“Interesting.”
“Isn’t it, though? You see, once upon a time a group of people believed that others than themselves caused all of the world’s problems. If they were hammering a nail and hit their thumb, it wasn’t their fault; it was the fault of others. If the crops failed, they blamed others; if they were poor it wasn’t because they were lazy; it was the fault of others.”
“Reminds me of some people in the Middle East that have the same problem.”
“As it should, because that’s what the book is all about. By the way, I had help with this one: Rook Dunkin was the technical advisor. Anyway, at one point – Chapter Twelve – God has heard enough and makes them all little because, He says, if you want to think ‘little’ I’ll make you ‘little.’ And He did.”
“So the ancestors of the Little People ticked off the Man Upstairs?”
“Gee whiz, Roving, you saw them, they weren’t dwarfs or midgets. They were just smaller versions of you and me, with the same amazing mental capabilities, I might add.”
“That’s right; how they converted those Lionel trains to actually work is amazing in itself.”
“Look, I travel all over the world hawking my books and cutting ribbons at new movie theaters, and I can say with total confidence that people spending their time blaming others for their failures is not a recipe for success.”
“Constructive criticism?”
“No, nothing but the truth.”
“These days the truth will get you in trouble.”
“Sad, but true; nevertheless, it reads like a broken record: ‘No Jew between me and the sea.’ I mean, when is enough enough? You’d think at least one of them would get wise to the scam by now, wouldn’t you?”
“Scam?”
“Socialism, Dictatorship, call it what you will: the poor supporting the ruling class. In this case they’re called Ayatollahs and Imams, so-called scholars who keep the poor ignorant, just like our Democrats do here at home.”
“And skim whatever they can off the top.”
“And the middle and the bottom; offshore accounts but, most likely, banks in Switzerland. They control the press – information – so who is going to know or, for that matter, say anything?”
“So what’s new in the office?”
Molly, our secretary, inserts a song in lieu of a commercial.
“Aldila” (3:18)
“You’ve seen the hyperbaric chamber and now I want to show you my latest collection: ancient artifacts that were smuggled out of the Mosul, Iraq museum before the ISIS ignoramuses destroyed everything. These particular specimens are here for safekeeping until the time when Muslims will join the rest of the human race, but until then we must guard our museums 24-7 so the human race can continue to learn from the past.”
“Little people.”
“And forever will remain as long as Muslims denigrate the past, a convenient way to ignore the teachings of Christ: ‘Do unto others as you would wish done upon yourself,’ a teaching that they must ignore if they are to survive as a mindless mob following ill-advised teachings that condemn them just as much as no-accounts then as now. Every day they chant, ‘Death to Israel’ when they could at least pretend to be productive and chant, ‘Equal opportunity for all.’ And that’s basically the book. Buy it: ‘Ignorance Results in Perturbance.’ ”
“I’m sure the viewers will buy the book and maybe even see the movie, if that’s in the cards.”
“But there’s Little People all over the place; did you know that? When I was working my way through college, I went to night school: you know, going to school part-time, but they kept on changing the goalposts on me, which is why I went for fifteen years.”
“What do you mean, ‘changing the goalposts’?”
“Well, let’s say you start school – night school – and it takes you four years to earn a two-year degree, an Associate’s in Science (AS), for instance, because you’re not going full-time; you’re going part-time.”
“And?”
“And during the third or fourth year they add a course to the requirements for a degree and sometimes they just rename the same course. I’ll give you a for-instance: Sociology 101 is one of the courses required for a degree but they change it to Modern-Day Sociology 101 that may or may not use the same textbook (but reprinted with a new binder). Many professors require that the students have the new book on the desk with the receipt by the third class.”
“No kidding?”
“No kidding. I’ve taken Sociology 101 three times; the Introduction to Psychology twice; Ethnology 301 twice; The History of American Foreign Policy 101, 201, 301, 401 all three times: you get the picture. I have enough college credits for seven B.S. and B.A. degrees, yet all I have is one Psychology PhD., and only because I bit the bullet and took a year off from work and attended classes full-time for four quarters in a row. That’s how I learned about the President’s List: making the Dean’s List four quarters in a row, going full-time.”
“Well, going to school beats working, doesn’t it?”
“True, except you don’t make any money. Anyway, we have to educate the viewers that there’s a real problem mankind has and it’s called IGNORANCE, which the Muslims have in spades. I mean, really, now, what did destroying the Buddhist statues in Afghanistan or the city of Palmyra in Syria accomplish? What good did it do? How did such childish behavior advance the knowledge of mankind? And they keep on blaming the Jews for their own stupidity; I’m tired of it, and one would think they would be tired of it, too.”
“I agree wholeheartedly; this Jew-bashing for the past 1,400 years is rather tiresome. Negative vibes don’t work, and that’s the bottom line. Hope you do well on the book, Zork. And so, on behalf of the crew, this is Roving wishing you all a goodnight: Goodnight.
“Good show. Burger time: my treat.”
“My Sweet Lord” (4:40)