AND PREVENT LEAKS
by OPOVV, ©2019
(Oct. 29, 2019) — “Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to ‘The Pulse of the Nation,’ the place where we get to learn what’s bugging our neighbors. Hello, I’m Roving, as in Roving Reporter (RR), and we’re back on our corner, under the awning, about to waylay commuters on their way to the big city via our convenient railroad. Excuse me, Miss, Roving here for ‘Pulse,’ your award-winning information station. Got a sec?”
“I’m afraid not, Mr. Roving. I just can’t stand around and talk all day; I’ve got things to do, you know.”
“Not to sound rude or anything, but we don’t know anything about you. What’s your name, what do you do for a living and what’s your pet peeve of the day?”
“Well, first of all, I’m not one of those who likes to talk about himself; I want to make that very clear. My parents wanted a boy but got me instead, so they named me Billie, which was why I grew up as a tomboy. Can I say that on television? Can I say ‘tomboy,’ or isn’t that politically-correct these days?”
“Let me check, but my gut feeling is that we don’t really care about political correctness and, if my memory serves me right, we never did. So, Billie, what’s bugging you these days?”
“Well, we now know where the leaks came from, now, don’t we? No Seal Team Six massacre this time, was there? Now I’ve got a question for you, Roving.”
“Go ahead.”
“Do you think had President Trump briefed Ilhan Omar or Rashida Tlaib on the operation, it would’ve been like Hillary giving Huma Abedin the info about Benghazi and Seal Team Six?”
“Without a doubt; same with Nancy Pelosi and Chuck Schumer and a bunch of others, including cluing in Barry Soetoro, aka Barack Hussein Obama.”
“So I’d have to say the leaks from the Deep State are what’s doing us in, or used to. And you want to know what being a Muslim is all about? It’s a bunch of cavemen lording over women, is what. Remember Kayla Mueller, the aid worker who was kidnapped by ISIS? Obama got the Army deserter Bowe Bergdahl released but left Kayla to be constantly tortured and raped, until they murdered her. Five plus years – every day — of being beaten and abused: welcome to the world of Islam, Americans. And she never lost her Christian faith. Now if you’ll excuse me, here’s my train. See you around, Mr. Roving.”
“You too, Billie. Let’s take a commercial break, shall we?”
“Shotgun” (3:05)
“And we’re back with John who used to be in government.”
“That’s right, Roving, I was a Democrat in Congress and made a lot of money, mostly from our Interstate highway system, you know, the upkeep — repairs — are never ending. But this is what I want to say: if the Democrats hadn’t leaked in the past, then Pelosi would have a point, but because her office has leaked and other Democrats have leaked, she doesn’t have a leg to stand on. And here’s my ride. Bye.”
“Bye.”
“Excuse me, Mr. Roving, but I’d so much like to be on your show.”
“Where you from?”
“Iowa.”
“Sorry, but we have to break for a commercial. See you around sometime, but then maybe not, at least not in Iowa. Let’s ask this young lady if she would like to be on television. Excuse me, young lady.”
“Is that a pick-up line, ‘young lady’? Why, I’ve got ten years on you, sonny boy. You wouldn’t have some kind of complex, would you?”
“To be truthful, I sure as heck didn’t think you were older than me.”
“Then you believe your own lies, which is very telling on your weak personality: makes you a ‘Beta’ male.”
“So you wouldn’t date me?”
“I wouldn’t be interested in playing mommy. Trump is an ‘Alfa’ male, while Obama is some kind of little boy who has never become a man and never will. Read the transcript in The P&E, by the way.”
“That’s great. So what about Pelosi having a tantrum about not being told about the raid to kill that scum Al-Baghdadi?”
“She can’t keep her mouth shut, can she? I’m sorry, but that’s my ride.”
“And off she goes. The consensus is that it’s thumbs-up for Trump. And it really looks like the Washington fans jinxed their ball club when they were disrespectful to our president. Normal people would’ve applauded him; given him a standing ovation; I sure as heck would have. Imagine Hillary doing anything about anything, except crash our economy, open the floodgates to theft and murder like we’ve never seen before, unless any of us were around when Rome was being sacked.
“And that’ll do it for us. We here at ‘Pulse’ and all of our contributors thank our president and our military for doing what should have been done during the last Administration. And a very special shout-out goes to the men and women who train our fighting dogs and their handlers who go into harm’s way on our behalf. Thank you, one and all; we had a party in your honor for a job well-done. Thank you.
“And I see that our time is up, so on behalf of the crew, I’ll be wishing you all a goodnight: Goodnight.
“Another great show with a bunch of great news. Burger time; my treat.”
“Dracula’s Theme” (2:11)