by OPOVV, ©2019

(Jul. 17, 2019) — “Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to ‘The Pulse of the Nation,’ a place where you can rely on opinions based on fact and not something that we paid for from an untrusted person in England; statements based on real life experience; and by using deductive reasoning to arrive at conclusions that a two-year-old could figure out; that a lab rat in a maze can figure out in record time; and that, given time, a Democrat could finally accept the fact that they couldn’t keep their doctor, their health plan, their job and their savings, not to mention that the ‘Russian Collusion Hoax’ was, in fact, a real hoax. Hello, I’m Roving, as in Roving Reporter (RR), and we’re back at the — oh, okay; sorry for the interruption — but I’ve just been told that we’re not supposed to mention the name of the retirement home that’s just a little west of town. It seems the last time we were here we caused a few medical emergencies, so they say.

“Anyway, we’re at the home to interview our good friend, the General; that’s right: the General with his chalkboard on wheels. What room did she say? 124?”

Sound of knocking at the General’s door.


“How you doin’, General?”

“Aren’t you supposed to snap to attention, soldier? I believe you’re supposed to come to attention when a superior officer address a, a what? You look like a Lieutenant Colonel, but nowadays it’s hard to tell. For all I know, you’re a grunt or, the worst of the worst, a reservist. So, what are you, son?”

“Out. I’m out, sir; I served my country and got 17 years of nightmares for it, but I may have grown up since I ‘saw the elephant.’

“You mean the same elephant the settlers saw when they were going west? The elephant that told them not to take one step further? That elephant?”

“Yes, Sir, the very same one. I said enough is enough and I never had another episode of waking-up out of my mind.”

“Get over it, son. Face it like a man.”

“Aye-aye, Sir.”

“Sounds Navy to me. Me? I’m Army all the way. See my uniform? See these stars? Means I’m a General, so I know more than you; you got that?”

“Aye-aye, Sir.”

“I don’t know if I like this ‘aye-aye’ talk; sounds foreign to me. And don’t you guys use ‘starboard’ and ‘port’? Sounds confusing to me; why not just say ‘right’ and ‘left’ like us normal Army patriots, or is that repetitive?”

“Well, I know from first-hand experience that there’s the right way, the wrong way and the Navy way. Here’s the trick: when onboard a Navy vessel, think of the words with four letters: left/port; down/port; back/port. So this is how it works: say General Quarters is rung; well, to get to your battle station you may have to get to the bridge, but you’re at the fantail, the rear, of the ship, so to go forward you have to be on the starboard side and to go up you have to be on the starboard side. Meanwhile, those who have to go aft or down are using the port side; that way there’s never a kink in the flow of people hurrying to where they’re supposed to be.”

“That makes sense; I’ve often wondered about Navy terminology. I suppose there’s a reason for it all, isn’t that right?”

“Yes, General, there is a reason for Navy-speak, and the reason is that mistakes can cost lives, it’s as easy as that. So the wind is howling; it’s ice-cold and rough seas: ‘Helmsman, steer five points to port’; ‘Aye-aye, Sir, steering five points to port, aye-aye.

“In the Army we just say, ‘Yes, Sir.’ Seems the Navy uses a lot of words. I guess there’s not much to do floating on the water except talk a lot.”

“That may be, General. So, what are you doing here?”

“Doing here? Oh, no, I’m not here; this is just for a couple of weeks while my house is painted, inside and out. Excuse me while I wheel my chalkboard out into the hall: got to keep in shape, you know. Ever see a fat General? I thought not. So, tell me, what brings you to this neck of the woods?”

“In one of Professor Zorkophsky‘s bestsellers, he wrote, and I quote:Menachem Begin once said: When someone says they’re going to kill you, believe them.’  And then he cites numerous quotes from the Quran to support his thesis, which is that Muslims are not like us; don’t believe what we believe; and never will assimilate into the American way of life. What do you think?”

“I think that Zork hit another home run, is what I think. You know our movie, The Dandelion War,’ is doing very well, especially in France? They say the lines are as long as when the movie, Once Upon a Time in the West(8:41), came to Paris. Makes me proud to have a part in saving America while separated from active service.”

“As you should be, General. So let me ask you this:  How’s this double standard — of our laws — affecting our country?”

“What country? We have a country, that’s true, but in name only: in actuality, it’s a collection of people who have nothing in common, including goals for the future.”

“Okay; please explain.”

“We have five distinct groups vying for the destruction of our Republic:

Group 1: Us patriotic Americans who sit back and watch our country being destroyed. We mean well, but the reality is that what we see isn’t changing; matter of fact, it’s getting worse as we sit back and wonder what we can do. I say: arm ourselves, to the gills.

Group 2: Illegal immigrants who broke one law by crossing our border and keep on breaking our laws with complete impunity: they can rape our daughters and wives; we don’t care, for if we did we’d execute them; they murder us but we don’t execute them; they molest our children and, again, we don’t execute them; we follow the revised NAFTA trade agreement blindly, and, furthermore, they – the lawbreakers – know it.

Group 3: Muslims hate ‘The Great Satan,’ as they’ve been taught and are still teaching in the Wahhabi schools here in the United States and everywhere else around the world: England, Netherlands, Germany, Sweden, France, Greece, Turkey. Muslims will not and, if you would think about it, cannot accept Constitutional Law over Sharia Law. End of story, and there’s no way to sugarcoat Muslim assimilation into American culture: it’ll never happen. Muslims don’t like hot dogs, baseball, and Mom’s apple pie and, apparently, the flag upsets them as does the Pledge of Allegiance and the Star-Spangled Banner, let alone the Easter Bunny.

Group 4: The purveyors of Socialism, which consist of people who never had a real job in their sorry worthless lives. There’s no need to list them because we all know who the RINO’s and the Democrats are.

Group 5: Perhaps the most dangerous group of them all: the hypocrites; the ‘do-gooders’; the back-stabbers; the ones who say one thing but mean something else. The producers of Hollywood movies that have an anti-American theme; the TV commercials that have a double meaning; the subliminal messages in music, commercials and movies; the telling a talking-point lie often enough until it becomes a point-of-fact, reference The View and ‘Russian Collusion’; a CNN made-up word, as in ‘Trump’s a racist when, in fact, Trump is not a racist, but don’t let facts cloud the issue. The mainstream media reporting made-up news to promote the agenda to keep the gravy train of kickbacks from China to our members in Congress and some bureaucrats unabated.”

“Gee, General, I never knew you to be long-winded; you just brought us to the end of the program. But would you care to elaborate a little on the Muslims’ mosques being armories and the 22+ Islamovilles being the displaced Afghan terrorist camps that we sent our military over there to destroy, only to have the Department of Homeland Security welcoming them into our country, just as they have welcomed whole Somali communities into America? There well may be those who murdered our Blackhawk Down casualties living in the Dearborn or the Twin Cities area today.”

“Sure: they’re here to use our laws to take over our country, just as Hitler did to the Germans. The Muslims are combatants, even though they may not be carrying AK-47’s, and they should be treated as such; at least that’s what this retired General thinks. It would be a lot more humane to deport the Muslims now rather than to fight house-to-house in the near future; you can bet your life on that.”

“Okay, General, thanks for the in-depth answer and so, on behalf of the crew and the General, I’ll be wishing you all a good night: Goodnight.

“Good show. Burger time: my treat.”

G.I. Blues” (2:36)



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