June 22, 2023
“Justice for All” (2:24)
Dear Favorite Son,
As you are, I hope, aware, I am the top choice for being named Secretary of Defense in your next administration, and to prove my worth, I hereby suggest this song as your theme song for your election campaign:
“I Won’t Back Down” (3:01)
Thank you for allowing me the opportunity to fulfill my Constitutional duties.
Sincerely,
(President Trump, if you want to contact me, call me at Madam Shylock’s Fortunetelling Emporium located in Cassadaga, FL, which I trust will relay any messages promptly and accurately. Any other way may be a hit-and-miss proposition.)
“81 Million Votes, My A**” (3:13)