by Roving Reporter, ©2021
(Nov. 30, 2021) — “Shotgun” (3:05)
“Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to ‘The Pulse of the Nation,’ the place to hear it here first. I looked out my window this morning and saw a butterfly flying, a flower flowering and a human being running around in circles while going nuts. I used to think that the most dangerous part of my day was the potentiality of being hit by a meteorite or covered in lava or swallowed by an earthquake, but not so much of being drowned by a tsunami since I moved from Florida, to my everlasting regret (I’m not a biker, but if I were I’d say ‘regert’). Not once did it ever occur to me of being lied to, like we hear from our government and the Fake News, which, in reality, is the same thing.
“Today’s guest is our old friend, Professor Zorkophsky, here to talk about his latest bestselling book, ‘The Notion of Trust.’ Welcome to ‘Pulse,’ the most-watched information show in its time slot.”
“Thank you for the kind and complimentary introduction, Roving, and please call me ‘Zork’ to keep our conversation in a relaxing and informal mode.”
“Then ‘Zork’ it shall be. So, Zork, tell us about the book.”
“Be more than glad to, Roving. The book starts off with the marriage vows, specifically the part about not committing adultery, like my ‘ex’ done to me; so much for trust. In the second chapter I discuss the weather forecasts and if they predict clear skies and it rains if that constitutes a lie or not.”
“Well, which is it?”
“It’s not a lie if they throw in a percentage, like, ‘Beautiful weekend for any outdoor activity with just a 3% chance of showers.’ Or maybe a higher percentage; anyway, it gets them off the hook.”
“Sounds like cheating.”
“It’s called, ‘hedging the bet.’”
“What’s in Chapter 3?”
“Doctors, as in, ‘You need an operation and I know a good surgeon who will kick me back 20% of what he’ll charge you.’ “
“No way.”
“Face it, Roving, it’s the way of the world. Like we’ll stay in Afghanistan for 20 years and the military industrial complex can make a heck of a lot of money.”
“But what about our young men and women getting maimed and killed?”
“What of it? Look, apparently Vietnam didn’t teach us a thing. People ought to go back and read ‘The Pentagon Papers‘ once again and maybe they’ll learn how NOT TO FIGHT A WAR. Getting back to my book, the second half is devoted to the political spectrum of our lives.”
“I like the way you put it, ‘political spectrum.’ Kind-of highbrow speak.”
“I am, after all, a professor.”
‘Oh, yeah, right. So, tell us about how our politicians have lost our trust.”
“I go all the way back to the Greeks, where the senators devised a way to have lavish ‘fact- finding’ parties. Then I work up to the here and now, to the aldermen, and women, of Detroit conducting their ‘fact-finding’ parties in Hawaii.”
“So sleaze isn’t a new thing.”
“Hardly. And then we arrive at November 3, 2020. No, that’s not right. I work up to the early morning hours of November 4, 2020, a date that will live in infamy as the biggest fraud this country ever experienced, including the Spanish-American War.”
“That’s right, isn’t it? The fraud of Biden was front-and-center the morning of the 4th. In a normal setting, the fraud would not have taken off with a life of its own; it would have been aborted at 3:00 a.m., but because of the fake news, look what we got: Fascism in spades, eliminating every Mom & Pop store, every small business in the country in favor of big companies and big government acting as one. Next step: Communism, where the government owns everything, including us.”
“What about money?”
“They’ll ask for your silver and gold; then they open your safe deposit box and confiscate it. This COVID, in DIRECT PARTNERSHIP WITH THE CCP, is the second salvo against us; the first salvo was to name China as a most favorite trading partner, thereby circumventing tariffs, so rather than pay tariffs the Chinese paid our elected representatives and targeted bureaucrats, such as Fauci, Dr. Death himself, and use our money to advance their own military industrial complex. The Chinese used useful puppets such as Fauci, Swalwell, Pelosi and others.”
“So, I’m curious, what do you miss about your divorced wife?”
“I’m sorry, but I lost all respect that I had for her. If I could turn back the clock I would’ve done things differently, but, heck, I didn’t know I had PTSD or anything, like how to treat it. I thought passing out every night was the right thing to do, anything to escape the nightmares. Let me tell you this: if you never had combat-related nightmares, consider yourself one of the fortunate ones.”
“That bad?”
“It’s all you can think about, every waking second, about the nightmare that may happen. And let me tell you another thing: you’D sell your soul to the devil if he could guarantee a peaceful night; that you can take to the bank.”
“Is that why so many Veterans commit suicide?”
“I’d say.”
“What’s the cure?”
“The love of a good woman; close friends who share the same road to destruction. I know that drugs aren’t the answer.”
“You used to work at the VA as some kind of PTSD counselor, didn’t you? What happened with that job?”
“Yes, I was a counselor but they wanted me to push pills and I didn’t think that was right; that’s all there was to it. We didn’t see eye to eye. Look, communication is the key. I don’t mean talk it to death or about any specifics, but overall.”
“Explain ‘overall.’”
“Well, take 20 years of Afghanistan and then flying the coop, of running away with our tail between our legs and, to top it off, leaving weapons behind. Look, in the whole history of retreating, nobody, and I do mean nobody, in the history of the world, has left intact weapons behind. Nobody — nobody, that is, until ‘Let’s go Brandon,’ a fraud of an administration that no one can trust. We trusted Trump, but we sure as heck can’t trust Biden-Harris, unless it is to do the wrong thing.”
“You mean trust Biden-Harris to do the wrong thing?”
“Every time. Look, I don’t wish to appear rude, but I have another appointment.”
“Alright, but answer me this: is there anything you miss about your ex-wife?”
“You’re not going to believe this, but, even today, I miss our conversations.”
“You mean talking to her?”
“You bet.”
“Well, that’ll do it, then. Thank you for being on the show and hawking you new book. So, now is the time that I’ll be wishing you all a goodnight: Goodnight.
“Good show. Burger time: my treat.”
“We’ve Only Just Begun” (3:06)