by Professor Zorkophsky, ©2021
(Sep. 13, 2021) — “Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to ‘The Pulse of the Nation,’ the place to hear it here first. With us is Miss Susan Blight, the new Czar of Education. Welcome to ‘Pulse,’ the most-watched information show in its time slot. Glad you agreed to be on the show.”
“I’m not; I was ordered to be here. I’m a Dem and proud of it. My parents voted for JFK and I voted for Biden. I have what you call ‘Trump Derangement Syndrome’ because I cried when Hillary lost, so there. I was told to answer truthfully, Professor Zorkophsky. Now, let’s make this short.”
“Let’s. So I read your bio where it said that you want to replace the police with the ‘honorable members of ANTIFA’; is that correct?”
“Indeed it is. Wait, don’t interrupt me; I’m not finished. If the police were replaced by ANTIFA we wouldn’t have to spend so much money on overtime, now, would we? The switchboard would be quiet, because who in their right mind would call ANTIFA for any emergency?”
“Good point. Now, getting to the education part…”
“Masks, the little tykes must wear masks because it’ll make our job 20% easier when the little brains are deprived of oxygen. The latest statistic is that only 60% of high school graduates are die-hard stupid Socialists; we aim to up that number to 80% within the first year.”
“That’s quite an impressive goal, for sure. What about clean masks?”
“Say what?”
“I asked about clean masks. Aren’t you concerned about proper hygiene? I mean, masks get pretty dirty pretty fast, like after three hours they need to be replaced. And another thing about masks and the size of a virus: it would be like putting up a chain-link fence to keep sand fleas and chiggers out.”
“Don’t you dare bring up facts; I was warned about you Republicans.”
“Actually, I’m an independent Constitutionalist.”
“Same difference: Trumpster.”
“You got that one right.”
“You think you’re so smart with your hifalutin words like ‘oxygen’ and ‘hygiene.’ Next you’ll bring up the election fraud and thousands of ballots transported by truck from New York to Pennsylvania. I’m right, aren’t I?”
“Mind if we ask what you do as the Czar of Education?”
“Not at all; after all, it’s my job. First of all, I’m a school teacher and a member of the union in good standing.”
“You pay your dues.”
“Not really, because any pay raise we get automatically keeps pace with possible increased membership costs.”
“Dues.”
“Dues that we have to pay to the union to make sure we get the most amount of money for the least amount of work. We get paid 12 months for nine months of work. We are, after all, Americans.”
“Members in good standing with the ‘United Socialist Democratic Party.’”
“That’s quite correct, Professor Zorkophsky.”
“So what do you actually do?”
“Well, for one, we delete old words and replace them with new words.”
“Would you care to give us an example?”
“Why, yes, I would. I was beginning to think you’d never ask. Take the word ‘rapist,’ for instance. Now, usually that word would upset people, like maybe a four-time convicted ‘rapist’ just moved into your neighborhood, and maybe that rapist is also a ‘child molester.’ We simplify all that by saying. ‘Please welcome an Afghan refugee into your neighborhood.’”
“Goodnight.”
[So what do you call adult men who have a sick yearning to take a 12-year-old “bride” or a 60-year-old man marrying a 15 or 17-year-old girl? By force; without the consent of the “bride?”]
[Take the following under advisement: Our government is NOT protecting us and you better be armed because, when the time comes, many of our military and law enforcement will follow illegal orders. An “illegal order” is defined as depriving a citizen of his Constitutional rights, just as our government did when it railroaded LTC Terry Lakin in a kangaroo Court Martial where Lakin, the defendant, was not allowed to defend himself.]