by OPOVV, ©2019

(Dec. 18, 2019) — In the Land of Yeezana, everyone is on the same page. What do you say we listen in to what the people are saying?

“What page are you on?”

“I’m on page 214; how about you?”

“I’m also on page 214 and will be moving over to page 215 later on.”

“Me, too.”

“Glad to hear it.”

“That was pretty interesting; what do you say we move along?

“What page are you on?”

“I’m sorry; I’m not from around these parts so I’m not on any page.”

“Doesn’t compute. You have to be on some page, even if it’s the wrong page, although we have ways to deal with that. Doesn’t happen often, but it does happen. So, you say you’re not on a page, but what page do you think you would be on if you were on a page? By the way, today everyone is on page 214.”

“I must’ve gotten lost; took the wrong fork and ended up here, so if you would be so kind as to direct me back where I came from, it would be greatly appreciated.”

“And there’s nothing more than I would like to do for you – to send you on your way – but first we must straighten up your page problem.”

“But I don’t have a ‘page problem.’ Look, the only problem I have is finding my way back from where I came from.”

“And we’re helping you in that regard, getting you back. And we really would like to help you; matter of fact, everyone is working on it; you’ve no idea. Here, I’ll make it easy for you: pick a page, any page. Go ahead; pick one.”

“Well, if it’ll help me, I’ll pick one. There, I’ll pick that one. Yes. What next? Do I hold it or anything?”

“No; there’s no holding or anything else. Oh, my, but you picked the wrong page. You picked number 217; I’m sorry, but everyone else is on page 214. No, I’m sorry, but you can’t be helped.”

“What do you mean ‘I can’t be helped’? All I want to do is to get out of this madhouse. Page numbers and other nonsense.”

“What other nonsense would you be referring to?”

Impeachment, if you really want to know.”

“Yes, we do want to know, but we can’t help you if you won’t cooperate.”

“Who’s not cooperating? I’ve done nothing wrong, except I seem to have lost my way, is all.”

“No, that’s all fine, except you – by your own admission – have admitted that you don’t have a page number. Oh, I know, now you have a page number, but it’s the wrong page number. Everyone else is on the same page except you, and that’s a fact that we just can’t ignore.”

“Why not?”

“Because we have to all think and act alike, is why. My golly, what if we allowed free thoughts, what then? I’ll tell you ‘what then,’ free speech would follow, that’s what, and then where would we be? People just speaking their minds; maybe supporting the Constitution.”


“Look, we don’t want to get physical, but you’re just not cooperating at all. We’re gong to measure you for a Mao suit and you’ll find a complimentary copy of Mao’s Little Red Book in one of the many large pockets.”

“But I don’t want a stupid uniform or Mao’s stupid book. Who are you people, anyway? Who gave you the right to detain me and to dictate how and what I can think about or, for that matter, speak?”

“We’re Democrats.”

God Bless the USA” (3:25)


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