A Normal Conversation Aboard Ship

“SOMETHING TO DO”

by OPOVV, ©2018

(Sep. 16, 2018) — [The following conversation takes place on a NAVY destroyer.]

“How goes it?”

“It goes.”

“Anything new?”

“Well, Sparks said something about a strange message, but he didn’t elaborate.”

“’Elaborate?’ You mean he didn’t spill the beans; he knows, but he ain’t saying.”

“I ain’t saying what?”

“Oh, hi, Sparks; just repeating what you told me, that you received some sort of message. What is it, hush-hush?”

“Not yet, anyway, so I’ll tell you. I was just sitting there; you know, like I always do, with the door opened so I can view the horizon, at least on the starboard side, with my feet up trying to pick up the most distant rock ‘n roll station back in The World*, when out of the blue I get this call saying, ‘Spaceship Earth inhabitants, Greetings.’”

“’Greetings’? You’re kidding.”

“If I’m lying, I’m dying. I kid you not.”

“Was there an accent; you know, like a Southern drawl?”

“Or maybe it was, like, a Brooklyn one: ‘Hey, youz guys, how youz doin’?”

“I knew I should’ve kept my mouth shut. Look, there was no, ah, accent, okay? None. It was just some dude.”

“So it had a guy accent. So I was right.”

“I should’ve stayed topside. Can’t you guys have a regular conversation, just for once? I’m trying to tell you about this message.”

“And we’re trying to understand what you’re saying, but withholding vital information seems a little bit weak on your part; I mean, we’re listening. So now, after having to almost break your arm, you finally tell us some guy gets on the horn and greets us.”

“From outer space, you think?”

“Maybe it’s a message from another planet.”

“Maybe from the planet Krypton.”

“You mean like Superman’s parents sent a message to earth back years ago and it’s just reaching us now? Wow. Is that cool or what?”

“Seems a little late, doesn’t it? I mean, you think they’d greet us before dumping their kid on our doorstep.”

 “What are we, an orphanage?”

“So, did, what was his name, Jor-El, have anything else to say besides ‘Greetings’?

“Who is this ‘Jor-El’ character?”

“Superman’s father; who’d you think?”

“Look: I’m trying to tell you that we’ve been contacted by aliens from outer space. They’re up there, now, above us, in outer space, and they sent their greetings, like civilized people do, civilized people who have normal conversations without making stuff up. You listening?”

“We’re listening; we’re listening to some guy telling some other guys that he’s been contacted by Little Green Men, that’s what.”

“I didn’t say they were green, or little.”

“But you did say these aliens were men.”

“Okay, so I get it. This is my first cruise so I may be a little slow on the uptake; life at sea is boring so I can understand why you guys like to string things out. but this is a little too much, don’t you think?”

“Well, no, not really. So what was else did these aliens have to say to you?”

“I never said they were calling me, I mean, just me. It was just something that the antennae picked up, but then who knows the minds of aliens, right? Could’ve been for anyone. Anyway, the message was the world is at war, but few realize it and what’s at stake and, most important, what’s it going to take to win.”

“We’re at war?”

“Civilization is at stake. Do we continue to reach for the stars or do we languish in the swamp? Do we continue accepting ‘political correctness’ as a viable tool for criticism or do we shake it off as if it’s just baby talk: just noise with no meaning.”

“’Baby talk?’”

“Hot air; no direction; no thought; no meaning; no deciphering; no nothing and it all leads to no good.”

“What’s no good?”

“Losing; not to have won. It has been postulated that the human race may be a lot older than we first thought. Maybe humans have been here for millions of years; who knows? Do you know that artifacts attributed to humans have been found in coal seams? It’s true.”

“No way.”

“Yes way. Maybe we’re smarter than we think but not smart enough to have a moon base as a stepping-stone to the stars, yet not so smart as to weed out the social and psychopaths among us. There are many millions of people who believe in the mantra ‘Kill the Jew, Christian and the Unbeliever wherever Ye may find them. As long as the human race believes in such horse hockey, well, let’s hope saner heads prevail.”

“And that’s what the message was? Did anyone else hear it? Did you print it out?”

“Yep; that was the message, and I heard it, in the middle of the ocean with nothing to do. At least nobody has said anything about aliens contacting us, so maybe it was just to me.”

“Something to do.”

“Something to do.”

[*The World: home; USA]

“String Along” (2:20)

OPOVV