by Professor Wert, ©2021

(May 4, 2021) — “Witch Doctor” (2:23)

“Daddy, bedtime story time, and please don’t tell one that’s so convoluted that I don’t get the point of the moral message.”

“Consider it done. Once upon a time there lived an old witch who lived deep in the woods, so deep that there were no roads.”

“You mean she didn’t have a driveway?”

“No driveway.”

“She took the bus.”

“Well, I suppose she rode a bus.”

“How did she carry her groceries? Did she have one of those little flimsy metal carts that old women use to wheel down the sidewalk and never in a straight line? Was there a path to her house, and if there was, was it paved? Maybe she rode a bike, or even a motor scooter. Was it a tree house with a rope ladder? Were there bears?”

“She didn’t have groceries like you and me; she conjured stuff. Maybe she felt like eating a blueberry pie, so she conjured one. Maybe she wanted a particular candidate to win an election, so she conjured the votes to make it happen. She lived in a cottage and not in a tree house; no scooter and no bears.”

“Getting back to the election, you mean to say she didn’t care what other people wanted; all she cared about was what she wanted? Was she a selfish witch that nobody liked?”

“All ‘yes’s’; she didn’t give a hoot about the rule of law; all she cared about was getting her way, even though her way hurt her deeply.”

“In what way was her decision detrimental to her well-being?”

“Because she thought that by getting her way she would share in the steal, that’s why.”

“You mean she thought that she would share in the pie?”

“In a way of speaking, yes. You see, the witch thought that by cheating she would reap some of the payoffs, kickbacks and bribes floating around, but all she got was nothing; actually less than nothing because what once cost a dollar now costs five.”

“Was she disappointed in backing the wrong horse?”

“Well, I’m afraid not. Picture this: there’s this castle that’s surrounded by thick, tall walls. Biden-Harris and all the other crooks are on the inside and this witch and her fellow Democratic Socialists are on the outside, looking up, wishing for a piece of the pie to fall upon them.”

“They’re waiting for their ship to come in.”

“That’s right, but all they’re getting is paltriness in the form of a tax refund (her own money, mind you) from the government while illegal immigrants and migrants and anchor babies come pouring in, not to mention the jails and prisons being emptied to make room for even more people who commit mayhem with impunity.”

“Why, that’s horrible!”

“And do you know what?”

“No, what?”

“The people smelled a rat so they demanded a recount of the votes, an honest recount, and the witch protested.”

“Now just stop here for a minute. After all that’s been going on, the inflation and the over-taxed dollars being given back, you mean to say the witch still doesn’t understand that the fake votes were a very bad idea? That she made a horrible and perhaps an irrevocable error?”

“It’s a possibility.”

“Why, that’s horrible. So is that where we are now, in Arizona:  people outside the walls refusing an honest recount even though they’ve got nothing for it, except their standard of living plummeting?”

“I’m afraid so.”

“I don’t like this witch much.”

“And you’re not alone. Goodnight.”



Long Lonely Nights” (2:54)

Professor Wert

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