by Professor Zorkophsky, ©2021
(Mar. 30, 2021) — “Guess Things Happen That Way” (1:52)
“Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to ‘The Pulse of the Nation,’ the place to hear it here first. Let me tell you from the start we’re in for a real treat because, via Skype, we have none other than The Mayor of the Little People with us. Hello, Mayor. By the frenzied activity behind you, looks like you’re ready to take on the world.”
“That we are, Professor Zorkophsky. There was a break in the weather and we made up all of the time we lost because of the rain, so we estimate our ETA about right, give or take a couple of days.”
“That sounds really good. How are the troops holding up?”
“The enthusiasm is over the top, Professor Zorkophsky.”
“That’s really good to hear, Mayor. Now if you would, please call me ‘Zork’; I feel it makes for more of a relaxing atmosphere.”
“Will do, Zork, but you must address me by my title: ’Grand General,’ or ‘GG’ for short.”
“Then GG it shall be. Tell us your basic plan, that is, as long as you’re not giving anything away.”
“No, they know we’re coming, I mean, it’s kind-of hard to conduct a sneak attack with a squadron of radio-controlled DC-3‘s flying, at the max, one hundred feet. It’s the location and timing that’s the key to this operation. We know the target; they know the target; everybody knows the target: those who have turned their backs on the Oath they took to protect the Constitution.”
“You mean the Pentagon?”
“Yes, the JCS and this newbie, Mr. Toores-Estrada, the head of the ridiculous ‘Diversity and Inclusion’ nonsense, kind-of like women-on-Navy-ships stupidity, and the Capitol. Some of them we’ll ask; others we’ll just round up.”
“I’m almost afraid to ask, but since you are kind-of height- challenged, what forms of persuasion do you plan to use?”
“Are you familiar with the ‘cherry bomb?’ I think I’ve said enough, but cherry bombs, zip ties and duct tape are all we’ll be needing to accomplish our mission.”
“What is your mission? Hold it while we throw in this quick commercial.”
“This Guy’s in Love with You” (3:52)
“Okay, we’re back. So, again, what’s your mission?”
“To restore the Constitution.”
“You mean by ‘restoring the Constitution’ to kick out the frauds, Biden-Harris, and reinstate Donald J. Trump as the duly-elected president?”
“Well, yes, what else could it be? And while we’re at it, to gag Pelosi; that’s what the duct tape is for. We have one dedicated DC-3 that is just hauling duct tape. Matter of fact, we have plenty of supplies on hand already in Washington, DC, irrespective of that totally incompetent mayor, Muriel Bowser. They say some people rise to the level of their incompetence; well, she’s obviously one of them.”
“So your attack on the Pentagon is about the Constitution. Can you cite an example or two about what you’re talking about?”
“The Constitution states that each House shall be the judge of the elections, and that’s all we need. Each of us must determine if the word ‘judge,’ as an intransitive verb, means to accept fraudulent ballots, such as those cast by the dead, the underage, felons and illegal immigrants and migrants (that have no business in our country, imported with the express purpose to vote the Democratic-Socialist ticket) shall be accepted as true and honest votes.”
“But everyone knows that the election was a fraud.”
“No, that’s not good enough. To know the election was a fraud is one thing, but to call Biden ‘president’ is way too far over the top, and it’s got to stop. I believe us ‘Little People’ will get the ball rolling. We have a good plan and the troops to carry it out. Wish us well on saving our country.”
“Oh, we do. Anything we can do to help?”
“You can tell the police and the military they either uphold their Oath (to the Constitution) or suffer the consequences, which will be a lot more severe than ‘losing their pensions,’ unquote.”
“Do you think that they’ll believe you?”
“No doubt about it, trust me. I said it once before: there is no fighting group in the world better than a company of Americans who have the need to accomplish an objective, and we’re Americans and have the need to take our country back from the Deep State, a bunch of NAZI not-so-nice-people who want to do us in.”
“Like the Muslims want to ‘do us in.’“
“That is true. Look, crossing our southern border you have the illegal immigrants who are adamant about the La Raza movement, those who want the Southwestern states to secede to Mexico, and then from the east you have a bunch of Muslims who want to kill us and make the United States an Islamic Caliphate.”
“And then to top it off we have China. It’s a mess. The vacuum left by Trump in the Middle East has been filled by China, by the way.”
“I knew that. Plus we’ll start buying oil from OPEC once again.”
“I won’t mention the word ‘INFLATION’ if you don’t.”
“We wouldn’t want to scare anyone, now, would we?”
“Just want to say one more thing: those from the south want our freebies and those from the east want to kill us, so what possible justification is there for us to allow any of them to come into our country? Now we’ll say our goodnight: Goodnight.
“Good show. Burger time: my treat.”
“Most of the Time” (5:31)
Professor “Trash the masks” Zorkophsky