“NOTHING BUT EMPTY HEADS”
by Professor Wert, ©2020
(Sep. 18, 2020) — “Hora din Caval” (2:25)
“Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to ‘The Pulse of the Nation,’ the place to hear it here first. Hello, I’m Professor Wert, reporting from the Transylvania Hospital, located deep in the shadow of Mt. Moldeveanu, in the Southern Carpathians, in the country of Romania. I have been invited to conduct a full-body scan of a Democrat/ANTIFA/BLM/Looney Tunes who had an accident on a mountain-climbing expedition. With me is Professor Van Hop Sing, who will assist me. How do we know that the injured mountain-climber is a loser in real life, Professor?”
“By the Get Out of Jail card found in his wallet, is how. They were issued by Eric Holder, the corrupt and incompetent Attorney General under Barry Soetoro, aka Obama, who allowed Louis Farrakhan‘s followers (and others) to cross state lines to conduct voter intimidation, riots and associated activities, without the fear of prosecution from the RICO Act.”
“Oh. This patient seems to be in some kind of coma after his mishap while climbing the mountain. Help me slide him in the machine to see if we can determine what’s wrong with him and devise a course of action to fix him up.”
“Excuse me, Professor Wert, but have you actually ever done this before?”
“Nope; first one. There, all the way through. Now let’s look at the monitor.”
“Okay.”
“Now that’s strange.”
“What’s strange?”
“The brain cavity: it’s empty; a total void; unoccupied; nobody home, is why.”
“I don’t believe it.”
“Here, look for yourself.”
“But how?”
“I got a theory.”
“This ought to be good.”
“I think it is: what we have in the United States are public schools, from Kindergarten to university, that are really Federal Indoctrination Centers where a young brain is turned into mush and then in turn evaporates into nothing: no brain, no original thought, no ability to reason, acting like zombies, the undead, causing mayhem and havoc, with no thought as to why or to what end.”
“Which explains the insanity on your American TV and what your Hollywood spews out in the name of entertainment. You have the NFL and the NBA: empty heads running around in a defined area that they call a field or court.”
“That other people pay to watch: they watch other people run up and down, back and forth and even sideways.”
“That is true, but while they’re watching they have the ability to get up and walk out, turn it off, take a nap or read a book.”
“I see. But how does this person operate, move among us, talk and stuff?”
“By what we scientists call muscle memory. Here, I’ll give you an example. This your dog; what’s her name?”
“Countess.”
“For real?”
“We take our heritage seriously, Professor.”
“I see that you do. Let me ask Countess if she would like a dog treat. Would you like a treat? See, she took it: muscle memory.”
“An excellent demonstration.”
“I thought so myself. Well, there you have it, folks, absolute proof that Nancy Pelosi (0:09) and Chuck Schumer are nothing but empty heads. If we could see inside their heads we wouldn’t see a darn thing, now, would we? And that’ll do it for this episode of ‘Pulse’; this is your Professor Wert wishing you all a goodnight: Goodnight.
“Hey Professor, all that work made me hungry. Burger time: my treat.”
“Gypsy Woman” (2:32)
Professor Wert