“AGAINST COMMON SENSE”
by OPOVV, ©2020
(Mar. 27, 2020) — “Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to ‘The Pulse of the Nation,’ the place to hear it here first and foremost. Hello, my name is Roving Reporter (RR) broadcasting from our downtown studios and with us, via Skype, is none other than our very own intrepid explorer, Professor Wert. How do you do, Professor Wert?”
“I am doing fine and, as you can see, I’m in an undisclosed location in the Superstition Mountains outside of Phoenix, Arizona, doing a geological survey on how destructive amateurism has destroyed many of the Spanish clues as to the whereabouts of hidden gold. I have a permit from the Park Service that is timed-stamped so let’s cut to the chase, not to be rude, but to be factual. How can I assist you?”
“Looking for gold? How exciting. In your travels around the world, when you were in Tibet, before the Chinese Communists invaded the peaceful little country, you searched for Shangri-La and I believe, in a long-ago interview, you said you found it but were on your honor not to disclose its location; is that correct?”
“Yes, that is quite correct, which is why I can’t go back to that part of the world because, if I’m ever captured, I’ll be tortured into revealing the location of Shangri-La. And not only the Chinese, but everybody, seems to think that Shangri-La has riches; that the streets are paved with gold; that there’s rubies as big as ostrich eggs hanging from trees. Not so, I tell you. The riches in Shangri-La are of the mind: peace through harmony with nature and each other. There are no riches other than peace of mind, which the Chinese would destroy in a heartbeat.”
“You don’t have much love for the Chinese, do you?”
“Does anybody?”
“No, I think not. Their history is one of famine because they breed like rats and can’t seem to figure it out. So what’s one of the secrets of Shangri-La’s success, Professor Wert?”
“Simple: line-by-line veto. The people submit requests to the leader who crosses out what is ridiculous or, in most cases, against the law, either legally or against common sense.”
“That simple?”
“Ever hear the saying, ‘Everyone complains about the weather but nobody does anything about it’? Well, they used to complain about not having LINE-BY-LINE veto power by the leader until they did something about it, and the rest, as they say, is Utopia. And now I must go, for I just spotted a stone with the word ‘ORO*’ written upon it. Bye.”
“Bye. Well, wasn’t that interesting? It’s time for us to leave, too, and so, on behalf of the crew, I’ll be wishing you all a goodnight: Goodnight.
“Good show. Burger time: my treat.”
[*’ORO’: Spanish for gold.]
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