“TRUMP GETS THE WALL”
by OPOVV, ©2019
(Jan. 24, 2019) — “Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to another exciting show of ‘Pulse of the Nation,’ your one stop where we do the thinking so you can sit back and relax, knowing that we have your back. Hello, my name is Roving, as in ‘Roving Reporter (RR), and I’ll be your host for this particular slot of your television viewing day, and for those of you who don’t get our signal, welcome to The P&E where you can read a transcript of the show at your leisure. As you can see, because of the inclement weather, we’re broadcasting from inside the train depot; I mean, we don’t like to stand out in the snow and cold any more than you do.
“Excuse me, sir, care to be interviewed on live TV? Roving here for ‘Pulse.’”
“Oh, well, sure thing. Just missed my train anyway.”
“Where you off to?”
“The Science and Industry Museum; I work on the train layout, you know: volunteer work; I mean, we don’t get paid and wouldn’t want to anyway, it’s so much fun. Go down once a week. My wife says it keeps me out of bars.”
“Sounds like fun. So, what’s your name and what’s your main bug of the day?”
“Did you say ‘bug’?”
“What’s bugging you these days?”
“Oh, I get it. Name’s Roy and my main bug is the saboteurs of our republic. I watch your show, or at least I used to; now I read it off the computer to my best friend, Rocky, my Labrador Retriever.”
“And?”
“Oh, yes, sorry. I just want to say ‘thank you’ to Nancy Pelosi for giving us the wall, whether she likes it or not. And, come to think of it, I want to thank her for giving Trump the 2020 election.”
“How do you figure that?”
“Easy: walls work. Even stupid people know that prisons have walls to keep the bad guys away from the rest of us, and that maximum security prisons have maximum security walls, right?”
“Right on, Roy: keep going.”
“And so Trump will get the wall; America will become safer overnight; the economy will improve and there’s no end to the benefits, I mean, only as long as Trump keeps deporting ALL the illegal immigrants do we stand a fighting chance to survive as a country. Thanks, Nancy.”
“So because Pelosi painted herself in a corner Trump had no choice but to do the wall anyway: is that what you’re saying?”
“That and we hope the new Attorney General abolishes this sanctuary city insanity, maybe with a little help from the Supreme Court. Look, the key is to deport each and every illegal immigrant, you with me?”
“So Trump gets the wall and gets reelected?”
“Well, he’s got to follow through, you know, as in ‘kick the illegal immigrants O-U-T’ and then start on the Muslims, but that’s another subject for another day because here’s my train. Nice talking to you; bye.”
“See you around, Roy. And there he goes, to play with the model trains at the museum. Lucky guy. Well, I think he just may have a point: Pelosi backed herself into a corner and we get the wall one way or the other. I like it, and I like the sound of Trump for 2020, too. And that does it for us and so, on behalf of the crew, I’ll be wishing each of you a goodnight: Goodnight.
“I should’ve thanked Pelosi for giving us the wall; oh, well. Fact is, she backed herself into a corner with no room to maneuver, so Trump gets the wall and the Angel Moms will be thanking Pelosi for being played as a puppet by our president. Burger time: my treat.”
“And We All Shine On” (3:34)