“SAVING THE SWAMP”
by OPOVV, ©2017
(Dec. 13, 2017) — “Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to a special edition of ‘Pulse of the Nation.’ Apparently our producer has noticed that I haven’t been reading the letters to Roving as diligently as I could have, so she ‘suggested’ that I clear the ‘unanswered’ bin. Okay, what do you say we dig in and get these pleasantries over with after this commercial?”
“Push Push” (10:04)
Dear Roving:
Do you think the government will ever expose Obama as being, what you call, a ‘cheap suit’ for being a non-vetted de facto president; a total fake; failure; and flake to boot?
Anita
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Dear Anita:
No.
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Dear Roving:
At the end of each show, you always offer to buy the crew and selected guests to join you for a burger; do you always have a burger?
Dave
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Dear Dave:
Always except under special circumstances.
And talking about burgers: the best burger I ever had was cooked by a Master Chef by the name of ‘T. J.’ who worked in the deli section of a grocery store in Palm Beach, FL.
One day a rich lady came in and hired him away, which automatically revised my definition of ‘rich.’ It used to be if you had to ask the price of something you weren’t ‘rich’; being ‘rich’ is being able to hire whoever you want; whenever you want, and for whatever you want.
Gee, I’d like to have a mechanic maintain my vehicles: I hear that the mechanics of the McLaren Formula One Racing Team are top-notch; maybe I’ll hire one. See what I mean?
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Dear Roving:
Why are ‘Obstructionists’? What do they hope to achieve?
Mary
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Dear Mary:
An ‘Obstructionist,’ or Democrat, has nothing to substitute for Trump’s agenda, i.e., making America Great Again, as if fair trade and jobs are bad for America.
A ‘Obstructionist’ is really a Nihilist, which is the same as being an Anarchist, Socialist, and Stupid, whose goal is to save the Swamp at whatever cost, even if the cost is the Constitution and our country.
These people have no love of country, the military, Old Glory, and the National Anthem, for the concepts of the ‘Bill of Rights’; and, for that matter, the ‘Ten Commandments.’
That they’re being used is obvious to us, but, unfortunately, not to them, and to attempt to explain it otherwise is a complete waste of time, akin to explaining why Israel should be left alone and not waste time feeling sorry for a group of people who want to cut your throat for believing in the Golden Rule.
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Dear Roving:
What should we do about George Soros?
Linda
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Dear Linda:
I think we should send him back to Hungary and let them deal with the traitor.
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Dear Roving:
First it was the Russians, a made-up story. And now more made-up stories are surfacing, it seems like every day. Let me ask you this: no doubt some sleaze out there needs some money and will be willing to perjure herself for an accusation of an imagined or perceived grope. Reminds one of a perceived dishonor, does it not, as an excuse to do away with someone, not unlike the Salem Witch Trials, where insanity ran the hen house.
Pat
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Dear Pat:
You are correct: they don’t care if they’re “fake” allegations, they are that far removed from civilized behavior when a lie is utilized to achieve a desired result.
I say throw the book at them: jail is the answer for perjury.
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“And here we are on the sidewalk in front of our building, since we’ve gone through all of the letters and have a few minutes of airtime left. Excuse me, sir, Roving for ‘Pulse’; got a minute or two to be interviewed on television?”
“Sure do; like your show.”
“Great, so tell us, what’s your name and what do you do for a living?”
“My name is Professor Fudd and I teach Early English Literature.”
“No kidding? That sounds interesting; let me ask you this: what’s the earliest you’ve found?”
“Well, we used to believe ‘Lord Randal‘ was old and then ‘Beowulf‘ surfaced, but now we have a new contender that may very well be the first documented use of Ebonics, besides your regular old English.”
“Really? Now how in the heck did you figure that out?”
“It was in the book, ‘The Hobbit;,’ you know: Gollum-speak.”
“Why, that’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard; where do you go to school, Yale?”
“Matter of fact, I got my Ph.D. from Yale and I’ve been teaching this course, ‘Literature,’ for over ten years, I’ll have you know.”
“Not to be rude or anything, but you’re an Obot, aren’t you? You voted for Hillary, too.”
“Oh, so you’re one of those, are you? People like you I weed out of my class the first day.”
“Goodbye, destroyer of young people’s minds. Besides, it’s time for us to sign off. And so, on behalf of the crew, I’ll be wishing you all a goodnight: Goodnight.
“Liberals are destroying our country, wouldn’t you say? What a bunch of malarkey: Gollum-speak. Burger time: my treat.”
“THE THRILL IS GONE” (5:29)