The Meaning of Life in a Foxhole

“LET’S DO SOMETHING TO SAVE OURSELVES”

by OPOVV, ©2017

(Nov. 24, 2017) — “But this isn’t, like, a real-life foxhole.”

“Close enough.”

“I don’t see how it can be. Think about it: first, there’s no hole. Do you see a hole? And then there’s no, what do they call it, entrenching tool.’ Do you see one of those?”

“Hold it; calm down. What do you say we call it a pretend foxhole?”

“No way.”

“Look, if you stick your head up above a foxhole, they shoot at you, right? And if you stick your head above these rocks, they’ll shoot at you, so what’s the difference?”

“Well, that’s just it, isn’t it? Foxes, as far as I know, don’t make holes that don’t have roofs. They make caves.”

“Fox caves?”

“That’s right. What we need is a roof.”

“Let me see if I’ve got this in the correct perspective. That guy next to you? He’s dead: shot in the head. I was talking to him and he just, like, died, but you know what? I was telling him about this one date I had with a girl in my class in high school, a girl that I had a crush on since 4th grade. Anyway, the whole left side of his head exploded, like the bullet went right in front of my face; must’ve missed my nose by an inch, if that. I was saying that she was really nice and then his head exploded, but I kept on talking to him, even though he wasn’t, like, paying attention anymore. Do you get what I’m saying?”

“So how come you never dated her again? You just said she was fine, and you only asked her out once?”

Commercial break: “Different Drum” (2:37)

“No, no; you’re missing the point. If we were in a movie I’d get up for some popcorn, but then the butter would probably be rancid, the drink watered-down and even the ice warm.”

“All ice is the same temperature. Besides, there’s no such thing as ‘warm ice.’

“Look, we’re in a bad place, okay? Do you understand that the Lieutenant is wounded and not making any sense? The sun is going down and, I don’t know if you know it or not, but there’s not a lot of twilight in these parts. And then in the morning they’ll be back in spades. Most likely they’ll bring grenades and finish us off at their leisure, which will be one second after sunrise, in my estimation.”

Commercial break: “Reflections of My Life” (4:32)

“And?”

“So what I’m saying is during — very likely — the last few hours of your life, try and not take everything so literally. Like if a person says, ‘I could eat a horse,’ they don’t, in all honesty, mean that they could actually consume a whole horse at one sitting.”

“So I’m going to die?”

“What do you say we bet on it?”

“How much?”

“Ten dollars.”

“Okay.”

“And since I say you’re going to get it, give me the $10 now in case you do.”

“What about you?”

“Forget about me.”

“Okay. So what’s the meaning of life?”

“’Mind your own business’ is at the top of the list. I don’t care what you do as long as you don’t bother me or anybody else, even if I don’t even know them, which is why the TSA is such an utter failure.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean let’s say, for discussion purposes, you have a neighbor who told you as soon as he finishes building the huge catapult in his back yard that he’s going to lob a giant boulder on top of your house. What are you going to do, sit on your back porch sipping lemonade while you watch him complete the catapult or are you going to sabotage his project before he finishes it?

“Furthermore, let’s say there’s a particular group of people that you have to guard against. You have checkpoints; barriers; hardened foyers and buildings; a thousand and one extra expenses OR not have any member of that particular group around. It’s not complicated, but the idiots throw in wrenches, which is just another word for variables, and you end up with an unsolvable maze that no one could ever get out of.  For examples just look at Sweden and Germany and every other place where there are Muslims. I rest my case.”

“So what did you say?”

“I said, ‘Pay Attention.’

“And that’s it?”

“That’s it.”

“You made thousands of people read this just so you could say, ‘Pay Attention?’”

“To all of the stupid people, starting within our government, be it federal or local, to the MSNBC, CNN and all the other ‘fake news’ purveyors: the gravy train won’t last forever. At some point the Piper MUST be paid: either it’s a parade to honor the Constitution, country and military or else the prison lockstep to the showers where Zyklon B is dispensed.

“Enough of this: let’s get the show on the road and do something to save ourselves.”

“But the Lieutenant said to stay put.”

“As I said, let’s do something to save ourselves.”

As Tears Go By” (2:34)

OPOVV

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.