The Coward of the Country (RR)


by OPOVV, ©2017

(Oct. 8, 2017) — “Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and today we take the gloves off at ‘Pulse of the Nation’ and ask the hard questions that the other news shows avoid. We’ve been given the go-ahead from our editor to go after the meat and potatoes and bypass the shrimp cocktail. And here I thought we were doing a pretty good job, but it just goes to show you never know. So here’s what we did: we’re at the university’s observatory and invited some of the people who we’ve talked to in the past. The good pastor, from down on Hawthorn Street, is in charge of the barbecue, so we’re all set with food and drink.

“Excuse us while we sell you something.”

Don’t Leave Me” (2:13)

“First up is none other than Chief New Leaf. How.”

“How what?”

“How you doin’?”

“Doing what?”

“No. Stop. You’re an Indian, right? Well, part Indian, so Indians say ‘How.’ This is, after all, America.”

“Okay, it’s America, but I don’t know of any Indian that goes around saying ‘How.’ We say ‘Hi’ or ‘Hello,’ just like regular folk. We don’t carry arrows in a quiver and tomahawks; we carry revolvers and credit cards. So what’s the question?”

“Who, besides Attorney General Jeff Sessions, is the biggest coward in the country?”

“Hmm, you don’t make it easy, do you? Well, now, I’d say there’s hundreds in Washington, all those who failed to come to LTC Terry Lakin‘s aid; you remember, when the Obama Administration railroaded him in a kangaroo military Court Martial.”

“Okay, good answer. Thanks for showing up in your scrumptious RV. And if you’ll excuse us, please, for another commercial break.”

Tchaikovsky Melodie” (3:41)

“And next we have Madam Shylock, who flew up all the way from Cassadaga, Florida. Didn’t you have a pet frog that lived in the pond across the street? Whatever happened to him?”

“Oh, he’s still around. I fix him his Sunday dinner, you know. Have been for the last twenty years.”

“Somehow I’ve the feeling you’re serious. Okay, so what do you fix him?”

“It’s easy; piece of cake. I just take the butter knife and scrape the flycatcher.”

Commercial break. “Love Me Tender” (2:50)

“Great; I’m sure you’re a good cook. So who’s the biggest coward in the country?”

“The whole country? Why, let me ask you something: how come Obama, Eric Holder, Hillary, Loretta Lynch, Lois Lerner and hundreds of others aren’t taking up space down in Gitmo?”

“I think you cheated. Thanks for showing up. Next in line? Oh, it’s the Talking Dog.”

“You ought to be a comedian, have your own show, call it the ‘Pulse of the Nation.’”

“Who’s talking? You or the dog?”

“You’re certified, you know that? It’s me, the dog talking. Now I ask you: who else would be talking? What’s the question?”

“Who is the most completely worthless person in America?”

“Do they have to be alive?”

“Look, just answer the question, and you can’t say Jeff Sessions; you’ve got to pick someone else.”

“Impossible, the dog says. The dog also says she doesn’t like trick questions. And the dog says don’t you know you’re not supposed to tease animals?”

“I hereby withdraw from this show, besides the question. What I thought was going to be a bonus, a feather in my cap, has turned into a raving nightmare. What in the heck does it take to get Americans to act? Obama was a fake, yes? Hillary is a crook, yes-yes? And Jeff Sessions is part of the Swamp, triple-yes. My gosh, people, the world is coming apart and people are still asking, ‘Are you a Birther?’ It’s maddening to realize that you’re the only one who can see the truth.”

“The Talking Dog feels for you, not in a pretend sort of way, but for real.”

“Well, then, I guess that makes my day. Our laws don’t mean a hill of beans if they’re not enforced. Why, just look at the mess we’re in because we didn’t deport the illegal immigrants, and that includes expired visas. Do you know that 9-11 could’ve been avoided had we enforced the expired-visa laws? Nothing means anything anymore. Our country is imploding: we’re killing ourselves with this ‘homegrown this and homegrown that.’ It’s nuts, I tell you.”

“The Talking Dog says we better get on the same page and those that knelt rather than honor the flag and for what it stands for. The Talking Dog says her master will drive those who hate America to the airport if they promise never to return.”

“Why, that’s mighty nice of her, I must say. You know, Americans still don’t understand that Obama’s ‘transform America’ actually meant ‘destroy America’ by making her a Socialist State*, hence Obamacare. Meanwhile, the same advertising agencies continue to poison our subconscious, and the MSM continue to poison our consciousness, each of them eroding what we once believed in as a nation. I think we’ve covered those subjects in past shows pretty much, the subject matter and the subliminal aspect of it all.

“There shouldn’t be one person in the stands of an NFL game these days, okay? Forget the Talking Dog, I’ll drive you to the airport myself if you promise never to return. The day of the first kneel was the last time I watched an NFL game and I don’t miss it in the least, and here I was a die-hard fan for over 30 years. And now, Molly, our sound-boom girl, is signaling for me, on behalf of her and the rest of the crew, to wish you all a goodnight: Goodnight.

“Good show. Barbecue time: my treat.”

[*Socialist State: a satellite country of the UN.]

Whispering Bells” (2:27)






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