Back to the Absurd (RR)


by OPOVV, ©2016

(Apr. 21, 2016) — “Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to yet another exciting edition of ‘Pulse of the Nation.’ We’ve had an overwhelmingly positive response about our last show when we broadcasted live from ‘The First Church of the Absurd,’ so – you guessed it – we’re back again this time to interview the Most Honorable Reverend Jessie White.

“I must say, Reverend, you must’ve hit a nerve judging by the responses from our viewing audience.”

“Most people have common sense so they related to my sermon. It’s the ones that don’t have a lick of common sense that get themselves into trouble. Why, just look at the characters in prison: each one of them is dumber than a phone book because you got to really mess up to get sent to the Big House.

“I’m glad to be interviewed by you, especially since you went cable and satellite. I knew the Good Lord would shine His light on our little congregation. You know we’re not big but we do the best we can.

“Now that you’re here, you could help me out. See, I was thinking about next Sunday’s message and I’d like to bounce some ideas off you, if that would be okay with you.”

“Fine with me.”

“Okay, here goes:

“If you be for something that mean you against the opposite.

“You see, Trump wants to build a wall and deport all of the illegal immigrants, so if you’re anti-Trump, if you’re a Hillary, Sanders or Cruz  person, that mean you against building the wall and deporting illegal immigrants. Mean that all these illegals congesting our highways and prisons, schools and stealing assistance money earmarked for Americans, is just fine and dandy. Makes you wonder about such people, doesn’t it? Sure do me.

“Trump is for jobs; anti-Trump mean that you don’t want no job and why not? If working you make less than you would just laying around collecting welfare you’d be a fool to get a job. But tell you what: the smart ones collect welfare and work two jobs under the table. Against the law? So what?

“Our National Debt is out of control, but who made it that way, not you or me. No, siree. It was our career politicians who done us in.

“It was the people who we elected to represent us who borrowed money that nobody had, is what. Why, if we ran the church the way they run the government we’d be behind bars to protect the people from people like us, which is why Trump has the edge on Hillary and all the others who collect or collected a government paycheck.

“Look at that clown Kasich. His father worked for Uncle Sam and so do he and he’s suppose to be some ‘outsider.’ We’re not buying it.

“We’re not buying whatever those pundits say; how we’re supposed to vote and what we’re supposed to think.

“Take the Hillary baggage train: starts with Whitewater and ends with emails with a Benghazi and a Vince Foster thrown in for good measure. Add the Middle East and Libya for kicks.

“And then there’s ‘Lying Ted’ who is as Constitutionally eligible as Obama.

“The point is that it’s been the ‘career politicians’ who has put us all in jeopardy, that’s what. Why, they still haven’t figured out if Islam is a ‘Death Cult’ or a ‘Hate Woman Society.’

“It’s totally absurd to believe that we can’t put America on track again. The next person who says ‘That’s not who we are’ I’m going to publicly state that whoever said it in the past and whoever says it in the future, well, that’s no American because that’s EXACTLY WHO WE ARE.

“We are the keepers of the flame of Lady Liberty. We treat women with just as much deference and respect as any man whoever walked the face of the earth: nobody is better than anybody else, ever, not within these four walls of this church nor outside these walls.

“‘Not who we are’: Ha! We’re to serve and protect the Constitution from any foe, and that includes the riffraff that’s infecting our lives with this Sharia nonsense.

“Where’s the money from Kuwait and all the other Arab States for protecting them from Saddam Hussein, I ask you? Why haven’t we just taken the oil and give our people TWENTY-FIVE CENTS A GALLON GAS? Why not kick-start our economy?

“In the election of 2012 there was such a person who would’ve done all the right things to make America great again, and now we have Trump who also has a chance. The question is: will the American people at least give Trump a chance, because if there’s one thing we do know: we get just another politician we’ll just get MORE OF THE SAME AND VERY LIKELY WORSE.

“But no matter what happens, getting Obama and his hired murderers – Muslim Brotherhood – out of the White House will be a major step on the road to fix America. Add to that kicking CAIR – the fundraiser for the terrorist group Hezbollah — out of our country will be another happy day. Then we go after all the Muslims who’ve infiltrated the DOJ and the military and we’ll be on the road to recovery.

“So America has a chance; she squandered her first chance in not electing OPOVV as her president in 2012; let’s hope we don’t make the same mistake again. Trump needs to be our next president.


“Well? How’s that?”

“I liked it; matter of fact, I liked it so much that I’d like to broadcast it live this Sunday. That work for you?”

“I’ll even treat you and crew to burgers.”

“Sounds like a plan. See you Sunday, then. And that’s our show for tonight. On behalf of my crew I’ll be wishing you all a safe and pleasant evening: Goodnight.”

“Hey, but like ‘wow.’ You don’t hold much back, do you, Reverend? Hey, everybody, let’s go across the street and grab some burgers. My treat.”

Semper Fi


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