“TODAY’S CHRISTIAN SOLDIERS”
by OPOVV, ©2015
(Dec. 8, 2015) — “Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. One thing about growing older is that the concept of ‘tomorrow’ gets to mean more and more like ‘later.’ I mean, it feels like not long ago we had a Christmas and here we are at it again, which is good, at least from my perspective. I mean, celebrating the life of the Christ, Who had the audacity to suggest that people treat one another as they would wish to be treated (Golden Rule) was so far off the mark, at least to the people in power, as to get Him censored. Well, they did censor Him, now, didn’t they? They killed Him, but the message wasn’t censored: the message lived on. But you know what? They’re still trying to kill the message, which is why we’re here at the university to interview the chaplain, Monsignor Newman.
“Hello, Monsignor Newman, and welcome to our show. We’re honored that you acquiesced to our request for you to take time off from you busy schedule for this interview.”
“Glad to be here, Roving, and let’s keep this informal, if you don’t mind. I need this time to sit back, so to speak, and gather myself to see the big picture. Call me Francis. And hello, Mr. Cameraman and Sound Lady. Just tell me where to stand and if I should talk louder.”
“Thumbs-up all around. Got a question for you.”
“Shoot.”
“Funny. I didn’t know you had a sense of humor. Okay, here’s the question: You’re in a crowded department store and you see a large group of Muslims, and as you leave, you turn and loudly say, ‘Merry Christmas, everyone!’ So is it necessarily bad that you said ‘Merry Christmas, everyone’ to offend more than really wishing well-being to all?”
“First you have to realize that being a Christian is supposed to be fun; a life filled with joy; the choice to treat people as you would wish to be treated. I liked your intro, by the way. Having fun is good. A life filled with laughter and love is infinitely more rewarding than a life lived in loathing, hate, envy and fear.
“So it’s good to wish all a Merry Christmas, for whatever reason: to offend; to make people become unglued; that’s their problem, now, isn’t it? If they can’t comprehend that Peace is more desirable than War, let them be ‘offended.’ Let them wallow in their own pit of despair, trapped in their own hell of their own making. The acceptance of Jesus as your own personal rabbi – teacher—is but step 1. Step 2 is to mean it.
“So, to answer your question, it doesn’t make a hoot of difference if you say ‘Merry Christmas, everyone’ for real or for spite; the fact that it is spoken is the end result.
“When I was a young man I was tasked with installing wall-to-wall carpet in a room. I wanted to do the best job possible, so I counted the threads on each side of the carpet so it would lay perfectly, which I did and which it did.
“Meanwhile, another person was doing the same thing in another room. When we were all done the boss said, ‘Francis, you did a really good job, but it took you six hours while Joe, here, did the same job in two hours, yet they look the same.’
“So the point is it doesn’t matter how you got to your destination; the point is that you arrived. Everyone comes to Jesus in his or her own way; every path is unique. A person saying ‘Merry Christmas, everyone,’ whether out of spite or to offend, the end result is the same: the words ‘Merry Christmas, everyone’ were spoken and were heard.
“So go ahead, say ‘Merry Christmas, everyone’ to your heart’s content. Whether you mean it or not, the end result is the fact that the words ‘Merry Christmas’ were shared. The words of Truth can shatter the silence and live on. We are the vanguard; we are today’s Christian soldiers, so let’s use our weapons, whatever they may be, whenever.”
“Weapons? What are your feelings about carrying a gun?”
“Allow me to lift up my robe on my left side. See? I carry and I suggest every Christian carry. There’s nothing in the Bible that says we have to take it or to become martyrs. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a Mass to perform. Nice to have talked with you, Roving and crew. May God bless you.”
“Thank you, Monsignor Newman, for your insightful teachings. Well, you all heard it from the horse’s mouth, so to speak. Wish everyone a ‘Merry Christmas’ and carry a weapon. Ask Santa for a gun. That’s our show for this evening. This is Roving and crew saying goodnight…wait, the sound lady is making gestures. What? Oh, sorry. I’m supposed to add this: Merry Christmas, everyone. Goodnight.”
“Good show, guys. How about the Monsignor showing his gun? Now that was a surprise. A real off-the-cuff television moment. And it wasn’t a peashooter, was it? And we got it all on camera. Great show. What do you say we knock off a few boxes of ammo at the range, then grab a burger? My treat.”