by Rob Pue, New American Prophet, ©2025
(Nov. 4, 2025) — I guess I’m a bit late addressing this topic. It’s been coming across my desk for a while now, but I’ve relegated it to the “later,” pile because it didn’t seem that important to me. Maybe I thought it was just another concocted social crisis, undeserving of my time and attention, but I’ve come to understand this is a real thing that many are living with, and just maybe this particular demographic is finally worthy to be acknowledged.
I’m talking about the issue of “male loneliness.” Certainly, all people deal with times of loneliness, but men are disproportionately affected and probably always have been, but like so many other things in a man’s life, this emotional struggle has just been ignored.
Loneliness has been linked to a wide range of negative health outcomes, including increased depression, heart disease and even early death. In researching this, I learned that one out of four men in the US feel lonely or isolated either all of most of the time, and that same 25% of men reported having no close friends at all.
This affects Christian men too. According to a Barna study, 20% of practicing Christians — who are also regular church-goers — reported feeling lonely at least daily and 10% reported being lonely all the time. This number jumps to 50% for single Christian men, and participation in church or “men’s groups” doesn’t move the needle at all. While these men may interact with one another in group settings, it’s only on a surface level, with little to no depth in their relationships with one another.
And while men and women both experience times of loneliness, women are able to form social networks and share personal struggles and emotions with one another in ways that men haven’t felt appropriate or acceptable.
Maybe it’s the way we’re raised. Boys grow up with certain expectations required of them. They’re expected to be strong, tough, resilient, and keep their emotions to themselves. And, of course, nobody likes or respects a boy (or a man) who’s “needy” or a crybaby — but these gender expectations form mindsets that stay with them for life, thus making it very difficult for men to show any amount of vulnerability that could be construed as weakness.
Men are meant to be the workers, leaders, protectors and providers for their wives and children. A good man will willingly carry the weight of the world on his back for those he loves, but his efforts often go unacknowledged and taken for granted. A man must work hard to learn a trade that will allow him to earn a good living. Then, he must work hard at his job every day to bring home a paycheck and provide for family needs.
He’s also the one expected to deal with all the “man” stuff: all the yard work, home maintenance, lawn mowing, snow shoveling, car repairs, paying all the bills, fixing all the broken things, paying the taxes, attending to the happiness and contentment of his wife, setting a good example for his children, and in many cases, also sharing the household duties of cleaning, laundry, cooking, dishes, taking out the trash and pet care.
He doesn’t expect constant praise for all his hard work. He embraces his role in life, but after a while, being taken for granted can take a serious toll on his emotions — and, of course, it’s not socially acceptable for men to even have any emotional needs. If, after all this, he wears down and breaks physically — or worse yet, emotionally — he’s considered wimpy and weak.
I share all this with you, because as a man myself, I understand that men have real struggles that they deal with alone, in silence. Most will never complain and as I said, most of us are more than willing to carry the weight of the world without praise. We don’t expect acknowledgment or even a simple “thank you,” though I admit there are times it would be nice. We tend to put ourselves and our own needs last, because that’s just how it is. But sadly, all our hard work goes unnoticed by most — until it’s no longer there because we can no longer do it.
Read the rest here.