(Jun. 21, 2021) — [The following was sent to The New York Times Executive Editor, Dean Baquet, on Monday. – Ed.]
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Good afternoon Deano,
G7
Well the last couple of weeks or so were quite the victory lap for Joey. He knocked it out of the park at every stop during his travels through Europe. What a statesman with his unparalleled orating skills, his lightning quick lucid responses to any question thrown his way, as well as his polished Presidential demeanor. The way he put America first, and put others on notice, well it was simply breathtaking. Wouldn’t you agree Deano?
Of course, the radical right would have to rain on Joey’s parade as usual. They claim at best, he was pandering to our “Allies”, such as Russia, at worst just capitulating to them. He also basically badmouthed the past administration and the current Republican Party, telling foreign nations that our own government is fractured. This was once called a treasonous offense by the liberals, but not now, apparently. Vladimir Putin even gave a tongue in cheek post trip summary of Joey, with praising his political expertise. When questioned if Joey ever called him soulless to his face, Vlad replied, I do not remember, but he has a much better memory than me.” Then he just smiled.
The right claims his representation of the United States was an unmitigated embarrassment. Again, they point to his obvious cognitive decline as the primary focus. I don’t see it, do you Deano? Let’s look at a few of the examples from the fair and balanced left viewpoint and then take a look at the radical right.
One example was Joey’s interaction with the British monarch. Most on the left would argue Joey was spot on with his interaction with her royal highness and the rest of the monarchy. Discussing world affairs, as well as favorite flavors of ice cream- reportedly this is one of Joey’s go to subjects.
Well, the right would have none of it. First, they point out the faux pas of Joey meeting the Queen in sunglasses. Reportedly, the Queen was startled, she was under the impression that she was being approached by a motorcycle cop, perhaps for speeding?
Next they point out that Joey revealed the private subject matter he discussed with the Queen. This is a major no no, that goes against the Queens protocol. Ease up radical right, that’s Joey just being Joey.
To round out his England interaction, Joey tried to correct Boris Johnson that he skipped some people at his introducing of members at the round table discussions. Well Boris explained, “that he certainly did not omit anyone”. Joey realizing his gaffe, just chuckled, as did all the others. The right described it as when a Grandfather makes an inappropriate remark at the Thanksgiving table and everyone nervously laughs. Oh excuse me Deano, are we still allowed to reference Thanksgiving by name ? Or, should I just call it a day off….I don’t want to offend anyone. President Trump is a racist.
Then, there was the monumental showdown between the two titans, Joey and Vladimir Putin. This is where Joey really shined. As we all remember, Joe referred to Putin as a killer and another time called him soulless to his face! Well the sparks were set to fly in this anticipated 5 hour battle royale. I think anyone looking at this objectively Deano can see the United States and Joey were the clear winners, hands down.
Well, once again the radical right would have none of it. They point out a few minor issues which I’ll point out, pointless as they seem.
First they want to know how Putin went from a “soulless killer to a worthy adversary, who is bright and tough”. They say Joey folded like a cheap suit to the Russian leader, when meeting in person.
Next, they point out Joey giving Putin a list of 16 infrastructure sites that he CANNOT cyberattack.
The right asks, did he also give him a map and password information associated with these sites? You know, now that Putin knows these sites are of the utmost importance.
Then they ask, does this mean all other infrastructure sites beside these 16 are fair game to good Ole Vlad?
Well you have to give Joey a break. He made these statements to the press after having them wait 90 minutes for his scripted presser. He was running a little late due to the usual nap, and he also wanted to watch an episode of Murder She Wrote, reportedly it was one of his favorite episodes.
They point out his removing of sanctions on Vlad’s Nord Stream 2 pipeline, a real money maker for our “allies”.
There was no mention of his shutting down of the Keystone pipeline here, in The United States, on his first day in office mind you. They say, Joey‘s goal is to make us energy dependent, not independent….atta boy Joey! Take that radical right!
THE PRESS
Well, this issue never ends with poor Joey. The right will not ease up with their criticism of Joe and the press. Here are some of the issues they point to.
First, they point out the meeting with the Turkish President at the NATO Summit. Reporters were held for the usual 90 minutes waiting for Joey, this is his standard SOP. Well, he finally came in and muttered, “we had a good meeting”, when the press told Joey they couldn’t hear him, he said, “ I didn’t say anything”. Case closed!
Biden’s handlers then led reporters away, accepting no more questions. But that has always been Joey’s way…clear and concise, a presser legend, in my opinion.
Reporters were screaming bloody murder, as they had to get all their information from the Turkish press conference.
I mean can you complain anymore about tiny details press Corp?
Then of course, the right points to the meltdown he had when CNN reporter Kaitlan Collins had the unmitigated gall to ask an unscripted question.
Imagine asking Joey if he was confident Vladimir Putin would change his maligning behavior?
Joey whirled and said, “I’m not confident he’ll change his behavior. What in the hell, what do you do all the time?” What a professional retort, eh Deano? Joey downplayed Ole Vlad’s human rights abuses, (that’s what 3.5 million dollars will do). Finally telling Collins, “if you don’t understand that, you’re in the wrong business.”
Then Joey sauntered away putting on his trademark aviator sunglasses, such showmanship. It reminded me of General MacArthur walking through water!
The right was saying by this time, Joe was just sunsetting as he was confused and irritable. They say his scripted, shortened press conferences are becoming more and more of an embarrassment to himself, his handlers and more important our country. Why he even said, “I’ll take questions, and as usual, folks, they gave me a list of the people I’m going to call on”……really, this is who represents our once great country? The right is calling this the “saying the quiet part out loud”, moment.
Time after time, Joey says he will get in trouble if he goes off script. I ask again, get in trouble with who? I mean Joey was installed as the President of the United States, for goodness sake!
The right even said, the millions of dead Democratic voters who voted for Joey in 2020, are spinning in their graves with all his never ending gaffes.
Fun Fact
Here is something you rarely hear about. And I’m not surprised, because it is another time that Joey beat President Trump.
Did you know Deano, that Joey got 5 military deferments and President Trump only got 4. I bet you didn’t know, because I have never seen that printed in your unbiased apolitical paper The New York Times! The Joey deferments I mean, I’ve see many articles in regards to President Trump’s….that seems odd.
Yep, poor old Joe had some asthma, that kept him out of the military. Of course, that didn’t stop him from life guarding and playing sports. Rumor is, when he was a lifeguard, he only patrolled the shallow end, so his asthma didn’t come into play.
Keep up the professional apolitical reporting you guys do day in and day out at the Old Gray Lady, Deano. You guys are second to none….well, maybe CNN. Your integrity is a shining example for children everywhere.
Sincerely,
Chris Cirino