“PLAY THE LONG GAME”
(Jun. 29, 2020) — In the United States, an estimated 50% of marriages end in divorce. This figure rises by an additional 10% for those who are on their second or third marriage.
Sadly, between 20-40% of these divorces are caused by infidelity, with an average 45-50% of married women cheating during their marriage. For men, this figure stood at 50-60%.
Understandably, this causes a lot of anger, pain, and resentment.
However, what happens when a marriage simply runs out of steam?
Or perhaps you have become more like friends than lovers?
In these circumstances, surely it must be possible to have a friendly divorce? Actually, most divorces can be amicable if all parties involved take the necessary steps to make them so. Keep reading to find out how you can achieve an amicable divorce and remain friends rather than foes.
Remember that divorce affects everyone
It can be all too easy to become selfish during a divorce and think that you are the only one in pain. However, it is important to remember that your spouse is also hurting and mourning the breakdown of your relationship. Plus, your children, of course, if you have any.
Making sure that you remain compassionate throughout and take everyone’s feelings into account is a crucial part of maintaining an amicable split.
Don’t be ashamed to get help
You may think that you can sort out all the aspects of your divorce between yourselves. Still, even if there is no animosity between you and your spouse, once you start talking about custody and splitting your marital assets, you may find yourself getting tense, and arguments might start to arise.
Avoid this by seeking the services of rcklawfirm.com, a trusted family law firm with years of experience in dealing with divorce.
Make sure you have support
Again this is important for both you and your spouse. Make sure you reach out to your respective family and friends as you will need a positive network of support at this difficult time.
Try not to feel ashamed that your marriage has failed and avoid, as best possible, simply saying, “I’m fine” whenever anyone asks how you are. Instead, be honest if you are having a bad day and accept any offers of help and support.
Communicate via email
Quite often, meeting in person, or even talking over the phone, can be too painful and can lead to heated discussions that otherwise would not have happened. Making the decision to only communicate via email, at least in the early days when emotions are still raw, can be extremely beneficial and help you move forward with your divorce a lot more quickly.
Play the long game
Many people going through a divorce become overly focused on short-term wins in a bid to “get one over” on their spouse, but this is not conducive to an amicable divorce.
Instead, determine what you want in the long term once your divorce is finalized, such as joint custody of the children or 50% of the marital home.
It is important to remember that divorce is not a pleasant process to go through, even if you do everything right. It can be painful, messy, and heart-breaking. However, if you follow the above advice, it will get easier, and looking back, you will feel proud knowing you did the best you could despite the challenges you faced.
Sharon Rondeau has operated The Post & Email since April 2010, focusing on the Obama birth certificate investigation and other government corruption news. She has reported prolifically on constitutional violations within Tennessee’s prison and judicial systems.