GET READY TO ADOPT A CHILD
(Jan. 1, 2020) — Have you wanted to adopt a kid here in New Mexico but wondered if the time is right? Here are ways to know you’re ready.
For many residents of Albuquerque, starting or expanding a family is a significant step in their lives. It can be exciting but also present a challenge for those of us who find it difficult to conceive. If you are considering adoption, it’s a very personal and emotional decision. But at the same time, it needs to be made with a reflective element and the involvement of several parties. You might need to consult social workers, adoption agencies, and family law attorneys in New Mexico throughout the process.
It’s vital to be sure that you’re approaching this significant decision from the right place. Here are some ways to know if you’re truly prepared for adoption:
You’re financially stable
Having your finances in order is a good thing for would-be parents in general. As of 2018, the US Department of Agriculture estimates that a middle-income family would spend an average of $233,610 on raising a child, exclusive of a college education.
Every family will have different needs and ways of managing finances; being wealthy isn’t a requirement to become a good parent and rear a healthy and happy child. But you must have a stable income and budget for emergency expenses while seeing to the needs of your child.
A sound support system is in place
You might feel like adoption is your sole responsibility, but parents can always use some counseling and help with logistics. Kids benefit from interactions with supportive people not named Mom or Dad; it helps them to be comfortable around others while also learning boundaries and a sense of independence.
Adults need a support system, and so do children. Whether you have a spouse or not, if you’ve got close friends, family members, or even neighbors here in Albuquerque whom you can count on to be a part of this extended network, it will make a huge difference in successfully raising your adopted child.
You are fully committed
Being a parent isn’t a part-time occupation. While many parents hold full-time jobs, at the end of the day, your priority should always be your child. You could be working to bring sufficient cash flow. But if you’re putting in the extra hours to further your career, you might need to take a backseat while raising a child.
Emergencies will come up, and children will always want and need more time from their busy parents. As you consider adoption, think carefully about opportunities or other things you have to sacrifice and whether or not you’re truly ready to make your child your number one priority all the time.
You have the right motivation
Choosing adoption, in many ways, is all about developing the right mindset and sticking to it. Make sure that you’ve received proper counseling and moved on from infertility, for instance. Adopting a child should never be done as a means to save a marriage, either. And you shouldn’t be imposing a vision for your children. Instead, be prepared to adjust your expectations and guide them to grow each day.
Adopting a child will end up being a life-changing decision for you and your child. As such, it’s never something to be undertaken lightly or with uncertain motivations. Acknowledge the emotional nature of the process, but let sound principles and a steadfast commitment lead the way to be the best adoptive parent you can be.
Sharon Rondeau has operated The Post & Email since April 2010, focusing on the Obama birth certificate investigation and other government corruption news. She has reported prolifically on constitutional violations within Tennessee’s prison and judicial systems.