“I DID WHAT NEEDED DOING”
by OPOVV, ©2018
(May 18, 2018) — “Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to a special edition of ‘Pulse of the Nation.’ Professor Zorkophsky has invited us to share a session with a military man who was in combat and his thoughts during the ordeal. So, tell us, now, Professor, what’s it all about?”
“Please, Roving, no need to be so formal: call me ‘Zork.’ And as to what it’s all about, I thought I’d share a session I had with a Veteran that I found rather interesting; perhaps give the public some insight as to why some Veterans have a difficult time adjusting to civilian life.”
“Sounds rather intriguing. Okay, we’re all ears.”
“Okay, then: no interruptions, please. Let’s roll the tape:
“Satisfaction” (3:54)
He heard people ask, ‘What am I doin’ here,’ but if not here, then where? It’s not like you can stop and get off; everyone has to be somewhere, right? So here I am; now what? Is it over before it even begins or did I miss some sign along the way? Maybe there was a sign and I missed it; or maybe there wasn’t a sign and I missed that one, too: missed the no sign; the non-sign.
“We Got To Get Out Of This Place” (3:30)
Now what? What a bunch of sheep. I feel like answering ‘Baaa!’ I’d do it if I thought I could keep it up (which I know I can’t), but it would almost be worth it, just seeing the look on their faces: ‘Baaa!’ Guys my age are going to classes with real American women, sitting just feet away. You know what? Just about every girl in my high school was a Playmate of the Month and I didn’t let them know it. What a waste. Now if I buy the farm Julie will never know that I dreamed of her, along with every other girl in school. I bet I’ve been in love with more women in history and will you just look at me now: going off to Nowhere-Land and for what?
“Ferry Across The Mersey” (2:24)
They say for the ‘American Way,’ but I’ve seen the writing on the wall. These guys around me haven’t; even the Shave Tail Lieutenant is oblivious to what I know for a fact: it’s a Wasteland. But I’ll keep my own counsel because if I’ve learned anything it’s better to zip it and to keep your thoughts to yourself. And NEVER volunteer. So here I am, a ‘reluctant volunteer,’ flying off into the sunset without a clue. So what do you say we do an in-depth comprehensive review of my life? Where to start? Birth is a good place and now I’m here, up the creek. That was quick. And we’re landing and this is when the fun starts.
“Wooly Bully” (2:29)
So I’m going to start a brand-new saying: Any landing that you can crawl away from is a good landing. Why do they shoot the pilot so the plane wrecks? Maybe not shoot the pilot until the plane has come to a complete stop? Or would that be considered an original thought and, therefore, be frowned upon and violate my very own new Code of Conduct: zipper it; don’t – as in NEVER – volunteer; keep your mouth shut and keep your own counsel. Oh, that’s ripe: my own counsel has got me in the middle of nowhere where people who I don’t know and who don’t know me are shooting at me, trying to kill me. Come to think of it, if I knew me I’d probably want to shoot at me, too, so I can’t really blame them, now, can I?
“Wild Thing” (2:33)
So we were sitting there, leaning against some earth and rocks, and I think I’m telling him about Julie when he ups and dies: got himself shot, he did. I mean dead as a door-nail, and quick, too, not shot in the leg like that other guy a few feet away, who if I don’t use my belt and make a tourniquet he’ll bleed to death. Learned that little trick in Boot Camp, believe it or not: reminded me of a stewardess giving a demonstration on how to fasten the seat belt. No; this guy I was talking to, telling him that I never even asked Julie out for a date, well, he got shot in the head, okay? I was thinking that when I go, do I want it to be quick or do I want to know what’s happening? ‘Oh, I’m shot so now I’m going to die’ scenario, but that’s not how it works, not out here, in the middle of nowhere. No, out here people get shot everywhere except where they got shot in a Hopalong Cassidy flick; there they just get ‘winged,’ whatever the heck that is. You hear a loud ‘Ping! (echo-echo as it fades away) and the bad guy declares, ‘I’ve been winged!’ as the hero’s sidekick states the obvious: ‘I think you winged him.’ Out here you get your elbow blown off and go into shock, or, well, you get the picture. I used to have a pair of Hopalong Cassidy six-guns but, truth be told, I wouldn’t trade this World War II machine gun for nothing. It’s a BAR* and I’d like to take it home, if I live that long. Heavy son-of-a-gun.
“Just Like Me” (2:34)
So I did what needed doing, and that’s all I got to say about that. Had we followed the Lieutenant’s orders we’d all have been killed the next morning; maybe some of us would’ve been captured and tortured, and then killed. But while my high school buddies were out on a date or at home watching TV, I was fighting for my life and the lives of those around me. And the guy who got shot in the leg? I dragged him a good half mile; up and down; over rocks and a few anthills, at least at first: you learn quick to avoid anthills. And when the end came I think it was the prize of water that drove us to the extreme, to take other lives as we were saving our own. True story and I’m telling it now because at the same time my former peers were living a normal everyday experience, I just passed them by: they were no longer my peers. They’ll never know what I learned about life that one night in a faraway place; in a faraway land that I took to bed every night for the next 20 years.
“Here Comes The Night” (2:49)
So that’s it, watching myself crawl and kill; watching myself making it back and into the frying pan again, and then finally back to Subic where I caught an oiler going to the South China Sea. And I thought about my high school friends, but mostly I thought about the girls that I grew up with, the girls who were spared the realities of war; a classmate of theirs having to fight with a knife to stay alive, quiet-like; in the dead of night. I thought what would they think of me now, if they knew. Better to keep your mouth shut. The guys? Why bother; it would be like explaining a moonwalk, wouldn’t it? Or trying to explain what Basic was like; receiving a ‘Dear John’ letter, and the unbreakable bond that was formed when all of us got one and we would read the letter out loud and critique the living daylights out of it: ‘I know you’ll understand: he was there for me.’ Welcome to The Club: all the initiation took was to volunteer to serve your country. By the way, the music selection is in order, except for ‘Here Comes the Night’; that one was kind of gratis.
“Hang On, Sloopy” (3:51)**
And that’s the end.
“Time’s up, anyway. Thank you, Zork; it was enlightening, I’m sure. And so, on behalf of the crew, I’ll be wishing you all a goodnight: Goodnight.
“Burger time: my treat.”
[*BAR: saved his life and the lives of a few others. Problem is that it draws fire, so in order to survive for any length of time you have to learn to aim and not waste precious ammo spraying. He named it ‘Moose,’ and he loved that piece. Too bad he couldn’t’ve kept it.]
[**”Hang On, Sloopy”: the joke was the lyric: “bad part of town”: imagine a whole country being the “bad part of town”.]
“Kicks” (2:24)