WHAT IS THE ANSWER TO ILLEGAL ENTRY INTO THE U.S.?
by OPOVV, ©2018
(Apr. 1, 2018) — “Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to a ‘closed-to-the-public’ meeting of the ‘National Brotherhood of Illegal Immigration Enforcement Retirees,’ which is being held at the church on Hawthorn Street. Hello, I’m Mr. Roving, your host, and with me here is Pastor Dunkin. What’s going on, Pastor?”
“You forgot to welcome the viewers to ‘The Pulse of the Nation,’ the most informative way to waste your time watching the idiot box.”
“You’re right, although I doubt if I would have put it in those terms, but, what the heck; welcome, one and all. It’s about to start so let’s listen in.”
“Welcome, Brotherhood, and if that sounds politically incorrect, too bad. Let’s all take part in singing our ‘National Anthem’ (3:35) followed by the ‘Pledge of Allegiance’ (0.24).
“Thank you. I hear we have a few alto sopranos among us; we encourage wife participation. At this time let’s bring on our secretary who will tell us some good news.”
“Thank you, Max, and howdy to one and all. As some of you have noticed, Mr. Roving, of ‘Pulse’ fame, is with us to record our meeting: no camera. Welcome, Roving and Miss Molly. Now, as some of you know, my wife’s second cousin has a friend (who still lives in what used to be East Germany) who cornered the Soviet Guard Tower market when the USSR went kaput. He has offered to sell them to us for $3,000 each, but that doesn’t include transporting, which wouldn’t be that much if we would buy in bulk. I believe he has 700 of these towers, already packaged in a container. I believe six or so per container; you know, the piggyback metal containers that ships and trains carry.
“We have excerpts from newsreel footage showing how effective these towers have been and could be for us, and while we run the film I’ll sing a little ditty I composed for this occasion. Okay, run the film.
Stop! Turn around ‘cause if you don’t
We’ll just mow you down!
You invade our country and kill us
What difference does it make if by
knife or bus?
You bring your corruption and crime
with you;
You want to make America into the
Garbage dump you left,
so you better stop!
Turn around or we’ll mow you down!
“Why, thank you for the applause. Thank you. Did you notice that each guard tower’s machine guns overlap the towers on either side? Very effective, plus these towers have been already tested for effectiveness; in other words, all of the bugs have been worked out. Yes, Sam, you have a question?”
“So the idea of these towers are what, to replace the wall?”
“No, these towers can be put up in a day, so they’ll be effective immediately. And then they can stay in place after the wall is built as a backup and a rest area or command post. Maybe rent them out, like a motel; replace the machine gun nest with a double bed and bath. Advertise them as ‘Honeymoon Towers’; have a sprinkler on the roof so they can be advertised as ‘The Niagara Falls Experience in Texas,’ or something else as romantic. And that concludes my participation in tonight’s program.”
“Thank you, Chaz. And we’re going to cut the program a little short, except to say ‘Thank you’ to Pastor Dunkin for allowing us to use his auditorium and for the burgers he’s about to offer us.”