“CHANGING THE COURSE OF HISTORY”
by OPOVV, ©2017
(Oct. 9, 2017) — “Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to ‘Pulse of the Nation,’ the current-event town crier that just lays it out for you, our staunch and dedicated viewers, to decide the issues of the day. Hello, my name is Roving — as in Roving Reporter – and I’ll be conducting an exclusive interview with our very own Professor Zorkophsky, but first I’d like to address a question many of you have asked: ‘Instead of commercials you play music. Is this allowed? Are you getting away with something?’ Not at all, and I’ll explain after this commercial break.”
“The River of Dreams” (4:09)
“What you’re reading is a transcript of the live, well, almost live show, or it would be if we didn’t record it in the morning, edit it in the afternoon, and have it ready to be on the air in the evening. We can’t rerun the ads because sales and prices are constantly changing, so instead of empty airtime, which, as everyone knows, is the death of a program, we fill it with music. I suppose we could have elevator music, but that would be too boring for our customers/viewers. So we have Cheryl, our receptionist who, by the way, just had a birthday last Thursday, pick out whatever she thinks our audience would enjoy hearing. I won’t reveal her age because she also does payroll, which is the introduction to pay our bills with this commercial.”
“Take Me Home, Country Roads” (3:19)
“As I’m sure most of you know, if not all, Professor Zorkophsky just hit another one out of the ballpark with his current bestseller, ‘The Awesome Power of One.’ Good to see you, Zork. How long are you in town for?”
“Just for a few hours to be on the show to promote the book.”
“How’s your brother doing?”
“He’s doing fine and is also a writer; I’m sure you’ll be interviewing him some day.”
“Be looking forward to it. How is it in Washington? Is the Swamp as bad as it’s portrayed for us hicks out in the boondocks, the place where ‘planes fly over?’”
“You’ve no idea. It’s beyond the phrase, ‘Worse than you could ever imagine.’ It’s all about big business; nothing else matters. The Constitution is just treated as an undesirable impediment to whatever big business wants. Big business is interpreted as getting an open-ended contract with the government; in other words, the license to print money. ‘Stimulus’ was one such scam; peace in the Middle East is yet another scam; the United Nations ‘oil for food and medicine’ a scam; the Democratic Party caring about, well, I was going to say the ‘inner city kids’ but it’s so much more than that, isn’t it? It’s like they want Common Core*. They want the Teachers’ Union not teaching Johnny how to read so he remains as dumb as the Occupiers, Black Lives Matter, Antifa, everyone who watches The View, and all the others who are led by the nose for the destruction of free speech, and welcome to Totalitarianism.”
“That bad, hey? Well, now, what about your new book? And even before it hit the shelves it was on the Bestseller list.”
“That’s because of the huge orders from the major warehouses and bookstores; that’s how it’s number one just out of the gate. Very satisfying and I’ll make a bundle. The real money is in textbooks, you know. It’s like an annuity if it makes the required reading list.”
“Yes, I can see that. So you’re against the loose-leaf approach to textbooks?”
“On the contrary: I’m a taxpayer, too. It’s all part of the Swamp.”
“What is?”
“Textbooks; its a billion-dollar business, money flying everywhere. You see, with loose-leaf textbooks, if there’s a change, just take out a particular page and replace it. Now with a textbook, the whole book has to be replaced, which means more money spent, get it?
“Even the professors are in on the act. Let’s say this year’s class has a new and improved textbook over last year’s. So you sign up for the class but the professor says he or she wants to see proof that every student obeyed by having the new textbook on his or her desk by next class or else not be allowed to take the course.”
“Some deal. A real tragedy, and now we have to break for a commercial.”
“Tragedy” (2:05)
“The professors are hawking the new textbook. None of this ‘used textbook ploy, half-price at the college bookstore’ anymore. The professors get to keep their job and the money flows straight to Washington where the lobbyists shell out to those who play. If you don’t play the game the word gets out and you’re a pariah; one of the untouchables; ostracized; rendered a no-account.”
“And I suppose the word gets around.”
“The grapevine is faster than lightning.”
“Now about your book.”
“Pretty straightforward: each of us has someone, maybe a few someones, in our lives who we can look back on and say they influenced us, either positively or negatively. I had a drafting teacher in high school who I never thanked, even though I thought about doing so until I learned that he died. By then I was 20 years too late anyhow. Funny how time flies.”
“Isn’t it, though?”
“This Kaepernick low-life character is a great example of a negative influence of how just one person’s selfishness and disrespect can topple a billion-dollar industry.”
“So you think the NFL is over?”
“Over and out as soon as the NFL commissioner didn’t fire Kaepernick right then and there. Instead, Commissioner Rodger Goodell doubled down by saying it was Kaepernick’s right to show disrespect to out flag, country and all the Veterans who died for Old Glory. No, the flag is off-limits, and if you don’t pay homage to her you’re out, which they did and they are.”
“I suppose you go through history citing how one person can change the course of history?”
“Good vs. evil; right vs. wrong; positive vs. negative; future vs. past; light vs. dark; life vs. death; die in your sleep vs. being tortured to death; Christianity vs. Islam; Jesus vs. Mohammad; it’s all there in black and white. Nothing’s been left out. No glorifying, just the basic facts: the Golden Rule vs. Despotism, Tyranny and abandon all hope; a chance for the survival of the human race vs. the guaranteed extinction of our species. It’s a clear choice, but it’s amazing how many fools are out there in the world.”
“Well, it sounds like a really good read. I’m sorry to say that Molly, our sound-boom operator, is signaling me it’s time for me to thank you for taking the time to talk with us, Zork, and to wish you viewers a goodnight: Goodnight.
“Good show, Zork. Burger time: my treat.”
[*Common Core: think Islamic leaning textbooks out of Washington.]
“You Make Me Feel Like Dancing” (3:39)