by OPOVV, ©2016

(Oct. 10, 2016) — “Good evening, ladies and gentlemen. This is your Roving Reporter broadcasting from the ‘Home of the Corps’: Oceanside, California. It has been said that there’s more retired US Marines living here than any other place in the world, and I tend to believe it. We’re here at the boardwalk interviewing strollers.

“Howdy, folks, care to answer some questions for ‘Pulse of the Nation?’”

“Oh, we know who you are. We thought you were dead, especially since we haven’t seen you on TV. There were stories about that Indian Chief doing you in.”

“Ha ha ha. Well, as you can plainly see, I escaped the Chief’s wrath (just kidding) and here I am, back on TV. Here’s the question: what’s America’s sport?”

“Why, that’s an easy one: baseball.”

“Well, why not football?”

“Because football players don’t respect our country, that’s why. Kneeling during our Anthem…bunch of overpaid ungratefuls, is what they are. Wait! Don’t interrupt me, please. As I was saying, maybe not all football players disrespect our flag during the National Anthem, but a team is a team and its members stand together or they don’t, or they’re not a team!

“Yes, we hear you. And thank you for talking with us. And here comes one in uniform. Hello, private, what’s up?”

“Hello, Mr. Roving. Actually, I’m a Major.  I heard what you asked that last couple and I have to agree with you. I must say that my home life has improved immensely since my Sundays are spent with the wife and kids instead of watching football games.”

“Let me ask you this: have you boycotted football altogether because of the disrespect some of the players have shown to our flag?”

“You bet your sweet tomatoes I have. Look, I get my blood pressure exercised by dealing with recruits and the stupidities of Obama, so I sure as heck don’t need any more stupid on my weekends, if that made any sense.”

“Tremendous sense. And that’s all of our time and so, on behalf of the crew I’ll be wishing you all a goodnight: Goodnight.

“Good show, guys. No more NFL and our weekends have become free! There’s a dog and burger place down a little bit: my treat.”




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