by OPOVV, ©2016
(Jul. 15, 2016) — “Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to yet another exciting episode of ‘Pulse of the Nation.’ We’re on our favorite corner interviewing people like you going about their day.
“Excuse me, sir, got a minute?”
“How, Chief. Been taking the same train for over ten years so I’ve seen you and Roving ever since you started your enjoyable show. Wife and I watch it every night. What’s the question?”
“Well, what are you up to today? Like, what do you do downtown?”
“I’m the county’s presenter. Now you may ask, ‘What’s a “presenter?”’ Good question. A presenter is a person who awards trophies, plaques and commendations to people who have been singled out for outstanding performance.
“Today I’m going to award a judge for his fight against crime. Since this particular judge was elected to the bench, crime in his town has plummeted an astounding 85%.”
“Eighty-five percent! That’s totally amazing! What’s his secret?”
“It’s no secret. The first thing he did was have new HD flat-screen televisions installed in every cell. The second thing he did was to limit the signal input to only contain ‘The View ’ and ‘Morning Joe’ – so they’re forced to watch Mika Brzezinski. And it’s been working so well that career criminals, drug dealers, and thieves have all gone straight. We even had a pawnshop owner go straight. And, get this: we’ve had multiple confessions of murders that never even occurred.
“We had a prisoner who has been incarcerated for the past four months serving a two-year sentence confess to a murder that happened last week in Hawaii.
“The downside is that one of our ex-prisoners filed an ‘excessive cruelty’ suit and it looks like he may have a case. Anyway, here comes my train. Bye.”
“My, oh, my: talk about ‘excessive cruelty.’ Make anyone walk the straight and narrow. Here comes a young lady. Excuse me, got a minute to answer a question for ‘Pulse of the Nation?’”
“Oh, you’re the Chief, aren’t you? Like your buckskins and rifle. Watch the show every night with my dog. What’s the question?”
“Do you agree with Hillary wanting to import more of the invading army of Muslims from Syria and every other Islamic ‘Death to the West’ country into the United States?”
“You ought to be a pollster, Chief, the way you worded that question. But no matter how you asked the question, having any Muslim within the borders of any civilized country is just asking for children to be slaughtered.
“And as long as I’m the soapbox, Trump declaring war against ISIS is nothing but a joke. Why can’t he go one step further? Why can’t he declare war on the group that controls ALL of the terrorist groups: the Muslim Brotherhood?
“And even that’s a joke, isn’t it? Why can’t he just get with the program and declare war on Islam and get it over with? He says he wants to stop any future Muslims from immigrating to the USA, but it’s okay for the ones who are already here to stay here? Reminds one of the stupid DMZ * during the Vietnam War, doesn’t it? The DMZ didn’t work then and not deporting the Muslims that are already here is nothing short of a lifetime ticket to La-la Land.
“I say if you’re going to do it, do it. It’s like Vietnam all over again. A little here, a little there doesn’t work. It’s either go all the way and get it over with – finish it once and for all – I mean, this has been going on for the past 1,500 years — or let’s just give up, put our heads on the chopping block. And guess what? The whole world should’ve run each and every one of the members of the Khmer Rouge to the ground and publicly hung each and every one of them. Here comes my train. Bye.”
“Thank you, nice lady, and thank you, viewers, for watching. And so, on behalf of the crew, I’ll be wishing you all a good night: Goodnight.
“Great show, as always. That lady was right: it’s either wipe them off the face of the earth or why bother? Burger time. My treat.”
[*The joke about the DMZ in Vietnam was that it had absolutely no meaning whatsoever for North Vietnam.]
Sharon Rondeau has operated The Post & Email since April 2010, focusing on the Obama birth certificate investigation and other government corruption news. She has reported prolifically on constitutional violations within Tennessee’s prison and judicial systems.