This One Quality


by Dr. Tom Lawson, ©2013

Is happiness based on gratitude for all of God’s gifts to us?

(Nov. 28, 2013) — Today is a day for giving Thanks. To whom, to the Creator, for our lives and for our friends and family and country that give meaning to our lives.

As a therapist, I’ve learned that virtually every person who has come to me with troubles has one common problem, one that is at the root of all of their other problems and that is that they are profoundly unhappy….otherwise they wouldn’t be seeking help.

Yet, even though they are depressed, anxious or addicted (in a sad and dead-end attempt to kill the pain of their internal misery), still they don’t have a clue as to why, and they rarely, if ever, figure out why they aren’t happy.

Yet, at the same time, millions of people are joyously happy, all of the time.

So, what’s the difference?  Why are some people happy and others never happy?

The answer is so simple, but unless the person is willing to ‘hear the answer’, unless he/she has the ears to hear, they remain truly deaf, dumb and blind to their becoming happy. They remain imprisoned in their misery, with no awareness because they are so, SO invested in remaining miserable.

Yes, people get so enspelled in their misery, like the reported prisoner back in 18th century France who was imprisoned for 35 years in a teeny, tiny cell and was freed during the French Revolution. However, once freed, he couldn’t take the freedom and after a short while, asked to return to his ‘home’, the cell. So many, even when they are given the keys to escape their misery prison, refuse to listen or to act.

To those who are utterly addicted to their misery and who cannot possibly conceive of their lives not being a miserable hell, then I sometimes ask them, ‘Who am I to prevent you from the misery of your own private hell that you have built so carefully and so assiduously maintain?’

Then, if they still refuse to hear, their decision, their love for their misery, in turn, makes everyone around them miserable as well.  These are the truly lost, for they have so alienated those around them that they are now profoundly alone and have real reason for their misery.

For most, it is only after they have gone through almost unimaginable pain and suffering, that they are even willing to begin to ‘hear the good news’ of how to be happy.

So, for those of you who are, and who truly wish to be happy the rest of your lives, no matter how poor, how sick, how broken, how dysfunctional, how rotten your spouse, situation, job, boss, etc., may I offer you ‘The Key to Happiness” and that key is one trait, one characteristic that offers instant happiness.

So, if you’d like to know, then all you have to do is to practice it…It is so easy and it is ONLY one word….and here it is.

All happy people are GRATEFUL!  GRATEFUL all of the time for EVERYTHING in their lives, both the GOOD & THE BAD, for ALL of their experiences are designed to allow them to be free and happy via their recognizing that Gratitude is the Key to the Kingdom.

You may be aware of the recent article from the anonymous guy who transports the diabetic ill and he recounted how GRATEFUL these ill people ALL were for everything that others did for them.  One lady was poor as a church mouse but when he arrived at her very modest home, she exuded GRATITUDE for ALL that he did and even though she had nothing, she had everything.

Look around you, friends, and see if being Grateful is not the key to happiness and the key to unhappiness is simply remaining an ingrate, for ingrates are never grateful for anything. It is always someone else’s fault. Always someone else who is the cause of their misery, someone else who ‘done them wrong’…never them.

For them, there is neither happiness now, nor will there ever be happiness for the unrecognized source of their misery is themselves and their refusal to be Grateful for their lives, for their Creator (most are atheists, I have found) for their lives, their experiences, nor do they recognize that what they are complaining about, their ‘horrible’ experiences are in fact not stumbling blocks, but simply stepping stones to happiness and the steps are achieved by simply being Grateful.

Have a wonderful Thanks-Giving and I hope you find this of some value.

One Response to "This One Quality"

  1. Donald Butcher   Thursday, November 28, 2013 at 11:18 PM

    After reading editorial I think Dr Lawson has described HUSSEIN to a
    “T” as in Treasonous. NUF SED


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