by OPOVV, ©2020
(Nov. 9, 2020) —
“Blue Moon” (2:54)
“Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to ‘The Pulse of the Nation,’ the place to hear it here first. It’s raining cats and dogs and we don’t have anyone scheduled to interview so we’ll be taking calls at XXX-XX. Well, will you just listen to that, our first caller. Hello, Roving here at ‘Pulse’; what’s your name and what’s on your mind?”
“Hey, I got through; imagine that? Name is Hal and my birthday is next month so, to make a long story short, my wife said to me this morning, she said that she has an early gift for me and would I like it now or later, so I said now would be fine.”
“Why would she want to give you your birthday present a month early? What’s she trying to do, age you?”
“Funny. Then she said why couldn’t I wait like normal people, and then I said have it your way: whatever.”
“And then what?”
“Then she got mad, is what. She said she’ll give it to me whether I like it or not.”
“Well, that’s what she was going to do anyway, wasn’t it?”
“Tell me about it. Anyway, she said you’re the President-Elect, because I said so. So I said, let me get this straight: because the mainstream media went bonkers and declared Biden-Harris the ‘elect’ without the votes, anyone can do the same. Well, using that kind of warped logic, why not?”
“And what did she say?”
“She said exactly that and that I was as much a president as Biden. And I said, you know you’re right, thank you very much, but maybe I’ll just return it to Trump, that is, if you don’t mind and if it’s alright with you?”
“And then what?”
“She said that I was a peach and that she was glad she married me, so there. How about that?”
“Wonders never cease, is what I think about that. And that’ll do it for Hal. Let’s take a commercial break and then get back to the phones.
“Blue Moon” (2:52)
“Hello, what’s your name and what’s on your mind?”
“Hey, how you doin’?”
“Just fine, thanks for asking; what’s on your mind?”
“Hear about Joe Frazer voting in Pennsylvania and he was registered in Jersey?”
“That’s right; they’re so dumb they can’t even cheat right. Heck, Frazer’s been dead for nine years. Thanks for calling so I’ll be wishing you all a goodnight: Goodnight.
“Good show. Burger time: my treat.”
“Blue Moon” (2:18)