“WE’RE IN A WORLD WAR”
by OPOVV, ©2017
(Jul. 11, 2017) — “Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to ‘The Pulse of the Nation,’ the show that brings you the news that’s important. My name is Roving Reporter, and I will be your gracious host for this episode of ‘Pulse.’ What we usually do is stand here on this corner across from the railroad station under the awning in a suburb of our city and waylay people going about their daily tasks and ask them what’s going on in their lives; what they consider the paramount issues of the day.
“Excuse me, sir, Roving for ‘Pulse,’ the ever-popular news show. Mind telling us your name and what’s bugging you these days?”
“Not at all, Roving; we watch your show, by the way. My name is Doug and I’ll be more than happy to answer any questions you may have. What’s the prize?”
“We don’t give away stuff, Doug.”
“Okay; maybe I’m confused. What’s the question?”
“What about the ‘fake news’ and the non-existent ‘Russian connection?’”
“Well, to tell the truth, for my business it’s like we won the lottery. You see, we write textbooks, but nowadays we’re writing textbooks to order, thanks to people believing in fake news. Like maybe we write a textbook for Muslims so we say stuff like, ‘There was nothing before Muhammad: no dinosaurs; no Helen of Troy.”
“What about Moses?”
“Muslims aren’t allowed to question, got that? Anyway, we don’t care; all we want is to cash the check. We also do family trees. You tell us what you want and we provide, and it all started with the Democrats believing in fabricated ‘facts’ that they knew were lies but pretended they were facts, so much so, in fact, that they started to believe their own lies.”
“Let me get this right: you write textbooks to order, is that what I’m hearing?”
“That’s right. Let’s say you want the world to be flat and the earth the center of the universe. Presto! A flat world at the center of the universe textbook, made to order, prepaid; minimum order of 10,000. Let’s say you want a family tree stating that your ancestors came over on the Mayflower: done deal. You got the money; we got the goods.”
“What about birth certificates?”
“Funny you should ask that, why, just the other day we got yet another order from Obama’s people to have a bunch run off the press. Some want ‘Creationism,’ while others go for ‘Natural Selection’: we’ve even one school district that wants us to come from outer space, so we provide.”
“But aren’t you doing a disservice to the kids, teaching them lies?”
“Not any more than the Democrats are doing to the American people.”
“Good point.”
“I’m sorry, but that’s my train arriving. See you around.”
“Are you next, young lady?”
“Are you a chauvinist pig, Roving? I’m 22 and not one of your ‘young ladies.’”
“Never thought you were and now I’m sure of it. It’s just a salutation of politeness; it shows that I’m civilized and am a person of honor and integrity, but I’ll be sure to never open a door for you for fear of having the door slam in my face; that I’ll tell you. So you’re for women’s rights, are you? A women’s-libber?”
“So what? And I’ll have you know I voted for Obama – TWICE – and I voted for Hillary, too.”
“Oh, you didn’t have to tell me that; I had you all figured out a long time ago. So you hate America, do you? Love Socialism and women’s rights; only thing is, you’re too darn stupid to know when you’re shooting yourself in the foot.”
“We won; you lost.”
“Are you really that dumb? America lost; we all lost when Obama got elected, and we all would’ve lost a lot more had Hillary been elected. Obama is pro-Islam, as is Hillary, which translates DIRECTLY into anti-women’s rights. My God, open your eyes: women buried alive; beaten; whipped; beheaded: honor killing. And you remain silent, just as the LGBT community does, even though they’ve seen their counterparts around the world being pushed off tall buildings, hanged from streetlights or just your everyday stoning to death. And that reminds me: making marijuana legal just dumbs-down the voting public; you agree?”
“I’m for the decriminalization of marijuana.”
“Seeing that the goal of every government is to gain complete control over the populace by keeping ,the citizens away from books and by keeping them as comatose as possible seems to be working: ergo, Obama and almost Hillary, even though she broke laws that would get you and me jailed; plus she was an accessory to the murder of our Ambassador to Libya and three other Americans.
“You really ought to thank your lucky stars that Trump is your president; at least he’s looking out for your well-being, something Obama never did and Hillary would never do. Closing the doors to Muslims and deporting illegal immigrants is but the first step. If you had a smidgen of grey matter between your ears you would understand that, but you’re so blind with ignorance and hatred and, face it, stupidity that you’re blind to the truth. You and your sisters should be supporting Trump 110% but you’re just being used; herded into the pen so you can wallow with the rest of them as you’re marched off into the showers, reminiscent of Auschwitz, but you’re just too far gone to have figured it out; you and the rest of the NOW and the SPLC and the leftovers from ACORN and all of your Deep-State Democrat idiots that are just too far gone to realize that we’re in a World War.
“She got a free Get Out of Jail card, didn’t she? I watched it on television: ‘What difference does it make?’ You’re very rude, Roving; anyone ever tell you that?”
“It’s the highest compliment my profession can possibly muster, and I thank you very much. And scoot along now, please, since our time is up. And so, on behalf of my crew, I’d like to wish each and every one of our viewers (and readers) a goodnight: Goodnight.
“Good show, at least it was until that ungrateful… okay; okay, I’m calm. Burger time: my treat.”
“You Never Even Called Me by My Name“