by Roving Reporter, ©2024
(Sep. 13, 2024) — “Julia” (2:56)
“Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to “The Pulse of the Nation,’ the place to hear it here first. Yep, it’s not an illusion: we’re back on our old beat, under the awning, across the railroad station trying to waylay anyone who speaks English. Excuse me, do you speak English? No? Farsi? What about you? You do? Great. Roving Reporter for ‘Pulse,’ the most- watched information show in its time slot. Mind telling us your name and your pet peeve?”
“Name is George, Roving. Wife and I used to watch you on TV back in the day.”
“What day?”
“Back in the day when you could ride the Burlington to the city, do some shopping, eat a nice lunch, maybe more shopping or an art gallery and get home exhausted but happy, especially at Christmastime. Not now, not anymore. No one goes to the city anymore; too dangerous. Order online. And we can’t afford to even go out to lunch at a fast-food place: too expensive. Bad news all around.”
“So, who won the debate?”
“Hands down ABC lost, and the Hyena lied. Waste of time, if you ask me.”
“And that’s what we’re doing: asking you. What else?”
“What else is that I run a construction company and it’s hard to find good help, I mean people who want to work that speak English, not Ebonics or Spanish; got it?”
“We get it, trust me.”
“And I need office help, too. And you know what I’ve learned? Well, I learned a long time ago that you don’t hire anyone from Michigan because they were ‘woke’ before woke was the flavor of the day.”
“What were they infected with if it wasn’t woke?”
“Infected with ‘Affirmative Action’ nonsense, where they lowered the standards to accommodate the unqualified. I hire exclusively from Christian schools, never from centers of indoctrination like the University of Iowa where Caitlin Clark recently graduated from.”
“Why do you say that?”
“Because the school’s so stupid as to support rape trees, human trafficking, and Fentanyl, that’s why, not to mention inflation and open borders.”
“Well, now, it was nice to have met you, George, and thanks for talking with us. Stay safe. We’ll take a short commercial break; don’t go anywhere.”
“Glitz at the Ritz” (2:05)
“And we’re back with Nancy who has something to say.”
“What I want to say is that I grew up in this town, lived here all my life, and even I don’t recognize it these days. Why, look at the trash across the street, and I’m not just talking about what the wind blows around. And see those cops over there? They just stand around, but I really don’t blame them because whenever they arrest one of those illegals, the criminals are back on the street the same day.”
“What are the major crimes these days?”
“Let’s start with what we’re seeing. When a train pulls in and people get off, they target the easy pickings, you know, young women by themselves. About a block or two there’ll be a purse-snatching or maybe later an apartment invasion. Maybe she’ll get beaten and raped and so far, it’ll never make the news, and no one will ever get arrested. If she gets murdered, it might make page 3 of the newspaper but not on radio or TV. That’s just the way it is.”
“That’s bad.”
“But it gets worse, if you can believe it. Let’s say they arrest the purse-snatcher, the rapist or the killer and he’s a Muslim; what then? Then we hear that the police are ‘searching for a motive,’ believe it or not. No, I’ve lived here all my life and, like I said, I don’t recognize it anymore. So sad because this used to be a nice little town; even had its own dairy, believe it or not. Cloverleaf Dairy was just a block from the railroad tracks, right over there. Gone now because all the farms that used to surround the town were razed for apartments so there’re no more cows. Nice quiet town sold out to the big money men from the big city so now we have big congestion, big crime, and big problems.”
“So sad is what it is. The cows have gone and no woman is safe. The Dems call that ‘progress.’ This is your Roving Reporter saying thank you for watching — or reading, as the case may be. Goodnight.
“Good show, crew. Burger time: my treat.”
[Isn’t it interesting that Trump gave the Hyena an out, an open door to the presidency, and she was just too stupid to take the bait. Trump said that the debate was a complete waste of time, that she should leave, right then and there, and go to the White House and sign the proclamation to close the border, but she didn’t take the hint. The border remains open and will remain open until Trump closes [“Trump Won” (3:30)] it. Trump [“Justice for All” (2:24)] will save our Republic, not Kamala ‘Hyena’ Harris.]
“Singin the Blues” (3:00)
Roving Reporter