Roving Standing By to be Democrat Moderator (RR)


by OPOVV, ©2019

(Aug. 23, 2019) — “Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to where the truth is as common as the common cold, as the common denominator, and as common as can be. Yes, this is ‘The Pulse of the Nation,’ the award-winning show that’s talked about at the water cooler the next morning. Look, before we get into the meat and potatoes, before we dig in, and before we get down to the nitty-gritty, I want to make a comment about Israel.

“I’ve always admired the true grit of the Jews for taking a sandbox and turning it into a flower bed. The Jews used to carry water in tins, canteens, milk bottles and whatever would hold water for miles, in the hot desert sun, to quench the thirst of newly-planted fruit trees and vegetable gardens. They slept with loaded guns by their side at night and in the daylight hours worked their tail feathers off to create the oasis that is today’s Israel.

“Not that it will ever happen – no rational person would ever think it could — but how long do you think it would take for the Muslims to turn the paradise that is Israel into a barren wasteland, orchards clear-cut for firewood, and paved roads turned into nothing but potholes, not even suitable for a donkey cart? Decades? Years? Months?

“Israel used to stand alone, defending herself from the north, east and south, but nowadays she’s surrounded by foes from all sides that want to kill every Jew on the planet, irrespective of where they live. Israel used to be the buffer for the rest of us; she used to take the brunt of the Muslim hate for the West, but since 9-11 the world has changed dramatically. Israel has not become one of us; rather, we have become one with Israel, for we are also attacked on all sides and must sleep with a loaded gun at our side.

“Any weakening of our wholehearted support for the continued existence of Israel corresponds directly to our letting our guard down. Make no mistake about it: Muslims actually want to torture and murder the Jews, Christians and all the other nonbelievers of the world. You, yes, you – you who are watching us or reading the transcript of the show in The P&E, you’re in a building, on a plane or walking down the sidewalk and BAM!  You’re cut, slashed, burned, crushed, wounded, crippled and dead: why? No, we didn’t get hit with an asteroid; we got hit with our own stupidity: we were attacked – because we let them in – and killed – because that’s what they do.

“Anyway, getting back to Israel: we need them more than they need us. We need them, at the very least, to deflect some of the mindless hatred towards women. The West believes in equality, and to prove it Western Civilization allows women to speak their minds, own guns, and to get up and walk away — with the kids — from a marriage and get a divorce. We need Israel as our goal for women to carry a gun; we need Israel to show the world what the word ‘determination’ means; we need Israel to prove that walls work; and we need Israel to remind us that we can deport the illegal immigrants and the Muslims within our borders.

“Oh, thank you; sorry about that. I just received a note that Professor Zorkophsky just released yet another bestseller about people who had it in the palm of their hand but backed the wrong horse in midstream; it’s the story of Paul Ryan and Anthony Scaramucci, with an added chapter about the classic symptoms of somebody losing a sense of reality, where he profiles Illinois Senator Dick Durbin. Let’s say we take a break and then let’s interview somebody.”

A Teenager’s Romance” (2:19)

“Excuse me, Miss, Roving here for ‘Pulse,’ the best show of its kind on…”

“Sorry to interrupt you patting yourself on your back, but we all know about your ‘award-winning show.’ Isn’t it about that time of the year when you have another ceremony at the auditorium?”

“Yes, yes, another awards show. So, let me ask you your name and what’s your pet peeve of the day?”

“My name is Ruth and I’m ticked-off at the Trump-bashers. They keep on accusing Trump of this and that, but…they never offer a shred of evidence, and that really upset me. If you accuse somebody of something, you better have the goods; at least that’s my take on it. Oh, hear that? That’s my train. Liked what you said about Israel. Just curious, but have they asked you to moderate one of the Democrat debates, and if so could you ask them to provide one example where Socialism worked? Bye.”

“See you later. And no, they haven’t asked me to moderate any of their debates, at least not yet. Be glad to do it, though. You know something? Israel may very well be a key player in the macro politics in the future of the human race, who knows? But, if I were a betting man, I’d lay odds that the next giant advancement may be happening, right now, in that little country. It would behoove the naysayers to get on board, because the way I see it, you’re either for us or against us, and if you’re unlucky enough to be against us, better say your prayers, because that’s all you’ll ever have.  Oh, will you look at the time? And so, on behalf of the crew, I want to wish each and every one of you a goodnight: Goodnight.

“Another one for the archives. Burger time: my treat.”

Gabriel’s Oboe (clarinet version)” (5:28)


One Response to "Roving Standing By to be Democrat Moderator (RR)"

  1. Roving Reporter (RR)   Saturday, August 24, 2019 at 4:56 AM

    Anthony Scaramucci: Here’s the thing: I was watching Newsmax the other day and they had this clip of Anthony Scaramucci on CNN (or some other nitwit station), and he gives an example of Trump’s “method of incitement” where the crowd is chanting, “Lock her up; lock her up.”

    And why not lock Hillary up? She deserves to be locked up; like, if “Pay to play” wasn’t bad enough, how about her ambassador getting murdered, was that a quid pro quo for us taking-out Osama bin Laden? Was Hillary’s unsecured email hacked by Huma Abedin, which, in turn, got Seal Team Six killed?

    Does Anthony Scaramucci have a problem with Barry Soetoro being nothing but a cheap suit? Maybe Anthony Scaramucci is afraid to ask, “WHERE’S THE BIRTH CERTIFICATE?”

    Here’s the deal: Anthony Scaramucci isn’t any too smart, for if he were, he wouldn’t have married an Obot, now would he have? An Obot is against the Constitution; an Obot is pro abortion, anti free speech and is against the Second Amendment, just what the Deep State ordered.

    The Swamp tried to overthrow Donald J. Trump’s presidency, or maybe Anthony Scaramucci doesn’t have a problem with that. Maybe Swamp water makes people stupid, who knows?

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