“POLITICAL CORRECTNESS DOESN’T WORK”
by OPOVV, ©2017
(Apr. 25, 2017) — “Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to another episode of ‘Pulse of the Nation.’ As you can see, we’re back on our corner, under the awning, across from the railroad station about to waylay the next unsuspecting passerby to ask them what’s on their minds. With me is Eleanor, the Rabbit – not the Elephant – who has been put in charge of interviewing the young people who pass our way. And speaking of children, here comes one now. Take it away, Eleanor.”
“Thank you, Roving. Hello, young man, off to the big city?”
“What you supposed to be, the Easter Bunny? You’re a little bit too big for a bunny; you’re more of a rabbit. So what’s the deal, you’re trying to pass yourself off as the ‘Easter Rabbit?’”
“You got it, kid: I’m the ‘Easter Rabbit. Now, I’ve a question for you: what’s your take on Kim Jong-un’s threat of attacking the aircraft carrier USS Carl Vinson (CVN-70)?”
“He doesn’t know what the heck he’s talking about, does he? He probably thinks Obama is still the president and, consequently, the captain of the carrier is just going to let his ship get sunk. No, not with Trump in charge. If Kim launches an attack the Navy will take Kim out, is what I’d bet. Besides, there’s more than one carrier in those waters, you know. Here’s my train: Goodbye.”
“Excellent interview, Eleanor. And look who’s walking up but none other than our very favorite worldwide intrepid explorer, Professor Wert. Hey, long time, no see. What you’ve been up to?”
“You’d never guess so I’ll tell you: New Orleans. I’m doing research on my new book, ‘How to Protect Yourself in a Flash Mob.’ New Orleans, back in the days before Political Correctness, used to have a shoot-to-kill policy of protecting lives and property from looters during a hurricane. Why, just recently, there was a flash mob on a commuter train in Oakland, CA. One shot through the roof might’ve saved a lot of grief.”
“Yes, that is true, isn’t it? Could you elaborate a little more on your conclusions?”
“Well, I don’t want to give away the store – so to speak – but had the police taken quick and decisive action during the riots in Los Angeles, there never would’ve been one in the first place. And I’m well aware of the argument, but it’s my conclusion that killing a few rioters at the inception saves lives in the long run.”
“Did you say saves lives?”
“Four vs. 40; 40 vs. 400: simple math. And then you add the cost of the damaged and destroyed private properties and businesses, the trashed cars, the arrest records, and we’re talking a really big difference between a riot vs. no riot. It’s a darn good example of an instance where political correctness doesn’t work.”
“How come city folk supported Hillary?”
“Simple: because it’s the direct result of failing in their abilities to articulate the truth. To put it another way, saying isn’t doing. Free ‘this’ and free ‘that,’ with no delivery, has to take its toll at some point, and it just so happens that the last election was payoff time. Decades of not delivering finally trickled down into the voting booth: ‘Do you want higher taxes?’ ‘Do you want open borders?’ ‘Do you want the same “Johnny can’t read or write, year after year?” If ‘YES,’ vote Hillary; if ‘NO’ vote Trump.”
“I didn’t know you were a writer. Have you had anything published?”
“Actually, a few, but none in this country.”
“What country would it be, then?”
“Ireland it is, and before you ask, I’ll tell you. You see, they love Socialism and when I came to them, my hat in hand, telling them how I travel from place to place, just so I can inform folks about the outside world, they took pity on me, they did. So they published my book and that’s that.”
“What’s the title of your book?”
“The ‘Lighthouse Keeper’s Best Friend.’ I’ve gathered a number of recipes and captivating photos of different lighthouses around the world, including our Great Lakes, and have a proud coffee-table edition to show for it. Here, I’ve got a copy in my backpack: let me show you. Well, what do you think?”
‘I like it. Here’s a chapter titled, ‘The Universal Lighthouse Creed.’ What’s that chapter all about?”
“It describes the lighthouse’s contributions to all of mankind, excluding a number of isolated jungle tribes. It describes the whole history of the lighthouse, even before Mohammad’s time, and how it set the stage for peaceful trade between the countries of the world. One could go as far as to say the lighthouse was the beginnings of diplomacy.”
“It sounds like an interesting book.”
“Oh, it is. And it would’ve been printed in the USA had I refused to exclude the Muslim chapter.”
“How’s that?”
“Well, the Muslim pirates – the Barbary Pirates – would light fake lighthouses, you know, light fake fires to lure the ships in, only to run aground, at which time everyone would be killed or sold into slavery and the cargo seized. And then the USA put a stop to it once and for all, way back in 1815.”
“Great: if it could happen once it can happen again. And I’m getting hand gestures from our sound-boom girl to wrap it up and so, on behalf of the crew and my co-host, ‘Eleanor the Rabbit,’ I’ll be wishing you all a goodnight: Goodnight.
“Great show. By the way, what’s the secret if you’re ever caught in a flash mob? Always carry? Good point. Join us for burger, Professor: my treat.”
